In obedience to his instructions, games, and especially chariot races,
were announced to take place in the circus. We do not know if the mob
had broken open the prison and released the charioteer in whose honour
so much blood had been shed; but if so we may be sure that he was
present, and was hailed with shouts of welcome. The circus was crowded
from end to end--not a single seat was vacant. The eyes of the
spectators were fixed on the line of chariots drawn up at the
starting-point, and drivers and lookers-on awaited breathlessly the
signal. In their absorption they never noticed that soldiers had drawn
silently up and had surrounded them. A moment later, and a signal was
indeed given, but it was the signal for one of the bloodiest massacres
that ever shocked the ancient world. Probably the authorities who
carried out the emperor's orders went further than he intended, even in
the first passion of his anger. But of one thing we may be quite sure,
and that is that remorse and shame filled his soul when the hideous
story reached him. Not that he would confess it; to the public he would
say he was justified in what he had done, but none the less he would
have given all he had to undo his actions. He came back one night to
Milan, and shut himself up again in his palace.
At the time of the emperor's return Ambrose happened to be staying with
a friend in the country, for his health had suffered from his hard work,
and also from this last blow, and his uncertainty how best to bring
Theodosius to a sense of his crime. When he entered Milan once more, he
waited, in the hope that the emperor might send for him, as he was used
to do; but as no messenger arrived, the bishop understood that
Theodosius refused to see him, and the only course open was to write a
letter.
The occasion was not one for polite phrases, neither was Ambrose the man
to use them. In the plainest words he set his guilt before Theodosius
and besought him to repent. And as his sin had been public, his
repentance must be public too. But this letter remained unanswered.
Theodosius was resolved to brave the matter out, and next day,
accompanied by his usual attendants, he went to the great church.
At the porch Ambrose met him, and refused to let him pass.
'Go back,' he said, 'lest you add another sin to those you have already
committed. You are blinded by power, and even now your heart is hard,
and you do not understand that your hands are steeped in blood. Go
back.'
And Theodosius went back, feeling in his soul the truth of the bishop's
words, but prevented by pride from humbling himself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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