Americans -- France -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; France -- Fiction; Love stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
derision on her old conception of life, as a kind of well-lit and well
policed suburb to dark places one need never know about. Here they were,
these dark places, in her own bosom, and henceforth she would always
have to traverse them to reach the beings she loved best!
She was still sitting beside the untouched tea-table when she heard
Darrow’s voice in the hall. She started up, saying to herself: “I must
tell him that Owen knows...” but when the door opened and she saw his
face, still lit by the same smile of boyish triumph, she felt anew the
uselessness of speaking...Had he ever supposed that Owen would not know?
Probably, from the height of his greater experience, he had seen long
since that all that happened was inevitable; and the thought of it, at
any rate, was clearly not weighing on him now.
He was already dressed for the evening, and as he came toward her he
said: “The Ambassador’s booked for an official dinner and I’m free after
all. Where shall we dine?”
Anna had pictured herself sitting alone all the evening with her
wretched thoughts, and the fact of having to put them out of her mind
for the next few hours gave her an immediate sensation of relief.
Already her pulses were dancing to the tune of Darrow’s, and as they
smiled at each other she thought: “Nothing can ever change the fact that
I belong to him.”
“Where shall we dine?” he repeated gaily, and she named a well-known
restaurant for which she had once heard him express a preference. But as
she did so she fancied she saw a shadow on his face, and instantly she
said to herself: “It was THERE he went with her!”
“Oh, no, not there, after all!” she interrupted herself; and now she was
sure his colour deepened.
“Where shall it be, then?”
She noticed that he did not ask the reason of her change, and this
convinced her that she had guessed the truth, and that he knew she had
guessed it. “He will always know what I am thinking, and he will
never dare to ask me,” she thought; and she saw between them the same
insurmountable wall of silence as between herself and Owen, a wall of
glass through which they could watch each other’s faintest motions but
which no sound could ever traverse...
They drove to a restaurant on the Boulevard, and there, in their
intimate corner of the serried scene, the sense of what was unspoken
between them gradually ceased to oppress her. He looked so light-hearted
and handsome, so ingenuously proud of her, so openly happy at being with
her, that no other fact could seem real in his presence. He had learned
that the Ambassador was to spend two days in Paris, and he had reason to
hope that in consequence his own departure for London would be deferred.
He was exhilarated by the prospect of being with Anna for a few hours
longer, and she did not ask herself if his exhilaration were a sign of
insensibility, for she was too conscious of his power of swaying her
moods not to be secretly proud of affecting his.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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