Families -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Older people -- Fiction
“It’s the parrot,” said Jack; “I heard him before.”
“What does he say?” said Mitchell.
“Listen and you’ll find out,” said Jack.
They all listened and presently the parrot said solemnly:
“Now see what you’ve done!” and relapsed into silence.
“What does he mean?” Aunt Mary asked.
“He’s referring to his own affairs,” said Burnett; “come on—let’s get
coffee now!”
They all adjourned to a tiny room lined with posters and decorated with
pipe racks, and there had ice cream in the form of bulls and bears, and
coffee of the strongest variety. And then cordials and cigarettes.
“Now, where shall we go to first?” asked Burnett when all were well lit
up. No one would have guessed that he had ever felt used up in all his
life before.
“To a roof garden,” said Mitchell. “We’ll go to a roof garden first,
and then we’ll go to more roof gardens, and after that if the spirit
moves we’ll go to yet a few roof gardens in addition. We’ll show our
dear aunt what wonders can be done with roofs, and to-morrow she’ll
wonder what was done with her.”
“That’s the bill,” said Clover, “and let’s go now. I can see from the
general manner of my mouse that he’s dying to get out and make his way
in the wide world.”
“Mine the same,” said Mitchell; “by George, it worries me to see such
restless, feverish manners in what I had supposed would be a quiet
domestic companion. It presages a distracted existence. But come on.”
They all rose.
“Where are we goin’ now?” asked Aunt Mary.
“To a roof garden,” said Jack, “and we’re going to take the whole
menagerie, Aunt Mary. We’re going to get put in the papers. That’s the
great stunt,—to get put in the papers.”
“But we’ll leave the megaphones,” said Mitchell. “I won’t go about with
a mouse and a megaphone. People might think I looked silly. People are
so queer.”
“Put the mouse in the megaphone,” suggested Burnett. “That’s the way my
mother taught me to pack when I was a kid. You put your tooth brush in
a shoe, and the shoe in a sleeve and then turn the sleeve inside out.
Oh, I tell you—what is home without a mother?—Put the mouse in the
megaphone and stop up both ends. What are your hands and your mouth
for?”
“Yes,” said Mitchell, “I think I see myself so handling a megaphone
that the mouse doesn’t run out either end or into my mouth. My mouth is
a good mouth and it’s served me well and I won’t turn it over to a
mouse at this late day.”
“Let’s keep the mice in their cages,” said Clover, and as he spoke he
dropped his.
“Now see what you’ve done!” said the parrot.
“I didn’t hurt it,” said Clover. “Come on now.”
“Yes, come on,” said Burnett. “It’s long after ten o’clock. You want to
remember that even roof gardens are not eternally on tap.”
“Well, I’m trying to hurry all I can,” said Mitchell. “I’m the picture
of patience scurrying for dear life only unable to lay hands on her
gloves.”
“I don’t catch what’s the trouble,” said Aunt Mary to Jack.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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