The Relentless CityBenson, E. F. (Edward Frederic)
General
The Relentless City
Benson, E. F. (Edward Frederic)
British -- United States -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Upper class -- Fiction
But this afternoon it was not so much his own weakness in having been
so easy a prey to the blackmailer, and in having been incapable of
forcing himself to tell the whole thing to Mr. Palmer, that lay like
a shadow on him, as his present inability to feel as he once felt. He
had unlocked the despatch-box where he kept the letters on his return
this morning with Amelie, and read one through again. Passion vibrated
there--a passion which had once been his; he could recall it perfectly;
he could remember with the most vivid distinctness the rapture of
desire in which he had written those sheets of adoration. It had seemed
to him then that life was _this_: that the whole world, and whatever
it contained that was lovely and worth the worship of man, found in
her its completion. The best and the worst of him--for it was all of
him that wrote thus--was hers, in the passionate self-abandonment of
love. For that gift she had in return called him a pretty boy, and told
him not to talk nonsense; but for the faculty of feeling that nonsense
again for his wife he would have given everything he had. He saw and
fully recognised the exquisite quality of Amelie's beauty, and the
beautiful and generous soul that dwelt therein. Day by day he saw the
sweet unfolding of her nature--an unfolding as silent and as perfect as
the blossoming of a rose. He admired her, he felt passion for her, but
a passion that never was lost and blinded by itself, as his passion for
Dorothy had been. Often in that June of lilacs he had come home from
seeing her, and sat for hours, as if intoxicated or stupefied, unable
to speak or think even, only lie with mind open under the eye of his
sun. It was that power he would have given the world to recapture.
His ramblings had led him into an outlying piece of the park which he
seldom visited--a somewhat bleak, heathery upland, not more than a mile
or so from the house, but away from the beauty of the wooded glades
where he and Amelie had spent the morning. He was about to turn, when,
at some little distance off, he saw a couple of men standing by a
tall red rod planted in the ground, one of whom apparently was taking
observations through some sort of telescopic instrument. About a couple
of hundred yards further on was another rod, and, following the line
with his eye, he saw that between them and the park paling was yet
another. He rode up to them, and, with a certain resentment, inquired
what they were doing, and got for answer that they were under orders to
survey this piece of country for the projected railway. They further
explained that the line, when it reached the ridge over which he had
ridden, would probably enter a tunnel, and emerge again only outside
the park. Her ladyship, one of the men remarked in a rather insolent
tone, had given permission for the survey.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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