France -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Manners and customs -- Fiction
The next day was a bad one for Charles Waterlow, his work in the Avenue
de Villiers being terribly interrupted. Gaston Probert invited himself
to breakfast at noon and remained till the time at which the artist
usually went out--an extravagance partly justified by the previous
separation of several weeks. During these three or four hours Gaston
walked up and down the studio while Waterlow either sat or stood before
his easel. He put his host vastly out and acted on his nerves, but this
easy genius was patient with him by reason of much pity, feeling the
occasion indeed more of a crisis in the history of the troubled youth
than the settlement of one question would make it. Waterlow’s compassion
was slightly tinged with contempt, for there was being settled above
all, it seemed to him, and, alas, in the wrong sense, the question of
his poor friend’s character. Gaston was in a fever; he broke out into
passionate pleas--he relapsed into gloomy silences. He roamed about
continually, his hands in his pockets and his hair in a tangle; he could
take neither a decision nor a momentary rest. It struck his companion
more than ever before that he was after all essentially a foreigner;
he had the foreign sensibility, the sentimental candour, the need for
sympathy, the communicative despair. A true young Anglo-Saxon would have
buttoned himself up in his embarrassment and been dry and awkward and
capable, and, however conscious of a pressure, unconscious of a
drama; whereas Gaston was effusive and appealing and ridiculous and
graceful--natural above all and egotistical. Indeed a true young
Anglo-Saxon wouldn’t have known the particular acuteness of such a
quandary, for he wouldn’t have parted to such an extent with his freedom
of spirit. It was the fact of this surrender on his visitor’s part that
excited Waterlow’s secret scorn: family feeling was all very well, but
to see it triumph as a superstition calling for the blood-sacrifice made
him feel he would as soon be a blackamoor on his knees before a fetish.
He now measured for the first time the root it had taken in Gaston’s
nature. To act like a man the hope of the Proberts must pull up the
root, even if the operation should be terribly painful, should be
attended with cries and tears and contortions, with baffling scruples
and a sense of sacrilege, the sense of siding with strangers against his
own flesh and blood. Now and again he broke out: “And if you should see
her as she looks just now--she’s too lovely, too touching!--you’d see
how right I was originally, when I found her such a revelation of that
rare type, the French Renaissance, you know, the one we talked about.”
But he reverted with at least equal frequency to the oppression he
seemed unable to throw off, the idea of something done of cruel purpose
and malice, with a refinement of outrage: such an accident to THEM, of
all people on earth, the very last, the least thinkable, those who, he
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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