“And, Roscoe,” she wrote, “I have noticed it more and more since then.
He IS in trouble. There is something on his mind, something that he will
not tell me and that I can see is worrying him dreadfully. He is not
like himself at all. I KNOW something is wrong, and I cannot find out
what it is. I want to help him SO much. Oh, please, Roscoe, don't
think this is just a foolish girl's imagination, and does not amount to
anything. It does. I know it does. You are his best friend. Can't YOU
find out what is troubling him and help him, for my sake? I have meant
to speak to you about this ever so many times, but I seldom see you
alone and I could not speak while he was with me. So I decided to write
this letter. If you will try, just TRY to find out what ails him and
help him I shall never, NEVER forget your kindness. Perhaps he does not
want to marry me. Perhaps he does not care for me as much as he thought
he did and will not tell me because he does not want me to feel bad.
If that is it tell him not to mind my feelings at all. I want him to be
happy. If it would make him happier to have me give him up I will do it,
even though I shall pray to die right away. Oh can't you help him and
me, Roscoe? Please, PLEASE try. A girl ought to be perfectly happy who
is going to be married. And I am so miserable. I can't tell Mother
and Father because they would not believe me. They would think I just
imagined it all. But YOU won't think that, will you? You will see him
and try to help him, for my sake.”
And so on, eight closely written pages, ending with another plea to me
to see “poor George” and help him, and begging me to “burn this letter,
because I should be so ashamed to have any one else see it.”
It was a pitiful letter and, even in the frame of mind I was then in,
disgusted with humanity and hating the entire feminine sex, I could
not help feeling sorry for Nellie Dean. Of course I was surprised at
receiving such a letter and I believed, just as she begged me not to
believe, that the cause of her distress and anxiety was more imaginary
than real. But that something was troubling George Taylor I had felt
certain for a good while. The idea that he did not love Nellie I knew
was preposterous. That was not it. There was something else, but what I
could not imagine. I wanted to help the girl if I could, but how could I
ask George to tell me his secrets? I, with a secret of my own.
After pondering for some time I decided to walk up to George's boarding
place and talk with him. Nothing would come of the interview, probably,
but I might as well do that as anything else. I must do something,
something besides sit in that room and see mocking faces in every
corner, faces with dark eyes and scornful lips which told me that my
charming and cultivated society was not necessary to their happiness.
Taylor rented the upper floor of a house a quarter of a mile from the
bank. His housekeeper answered my ring and informed me that her employer
had not yet come home.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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