The Road to UnderstandingPorter, Eleanor H. (Eleanor Hodgman)
General
The Road to Understanding
Porter, Eleanor H. (Eleanor Hodgman)
Marriage -- Fiction; Married people -- Fiction
Burke paused, and drew a long sigh. The doctor, puffing slowly at his
cigar, sedulously kept his face the other way. The doctor, in his fancy,
had already peopled the old room with a joyous Helen and Dorothy
Elizabeth; and he feared, should he turn, that his face would sing a
veritable Hallelujah Chorus--to the consequent amazement of his host.
"Mother had trials of her own--lots of them," resumed Burke, after a
moment's silence. "She even had some not unlike mine, I believe, for I
think I could read between the lines that dad was more than a bit
careless at times in manner and speech compared to the polished ways of
the men of her family and social circle. But mother neither whined nor
ran away. She just smiled and kept bravely straight ahead; and by and by
they were under her feet, where they belonged--all those things that
plagued. But I--I both whined and ran away--because I didn't like the
way my wife ate her soup and spread her bread. They seem so small
now--all those little ways I hated--small beside the big things that
really counted. Do you know? I believe if more people would stop making
the little things big and the big things little, there'd be a whole heap
more happiness lying around in this old world! And Helen--poor Helen!
She tried-- I know she tried. Lots of times, when I was reading in the
diaries what mother said about dad,--how she mustn't let him get
discouraged or downhearted; how she must tell him she just knew he was
going to succeed,--lots of times then I'd think of Helen. Helen used to
talk that way to me at the first! I wonder now if Helen kept a diary!
And I can't help wondering if, supposing I had been a little less apt to
notice the annoyances, and a little more inclined to see the good-- Bah!
There, there, old man, forgive me," he broke off, with a shrug. "I
didn't mean to run on like this. I really didn't--for all the world like
the heart-to-heart advice to the lovelorn in a daily news column!"
"I'm glad you did, Burke." The doctor's carefully controlled voice
expressed cheery interest; that was all. "And now what do you propose to
do?"
"Do? How? What do you mean?"
"Why, about--your wife, of course."
"Nothing. There's nothing I can do. And that's the pity of it. She will
go on, of course, to the end of her life, thinking me a cad and a
coward."
"But if you could be--er--brought together again," suggested the doctor
in a voice so coldly impersonal it was almost indifferent.
"Oh, yes, of course--perhaps. But that's not likely. I don't know where
she is, remember; and she's not likely to come back of her own accord,
after all this time. Besides, if she did, who's to guarantee that a few
old diaries have changed me from an unbearably selfish brute to a
livably patient and pleasant person to have about the house? Not but
what I'd jump at the chance to try, but-- Well, we'll wait till I get
it," he finished dryly, with a lightness that was plainly assumed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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