"What is it? I may use my discretion about answering your question at
all when I hear it; but if I decide on answering it, be quite sure
that I will tell you the exact truth."
"No, you won't, my dear," said Mrs. Bloxam; "I don't require it. I
want only the vague truth; tell me that. Is the secret of your quarrel
with your husband one which puts him in your power--which secures your
liberty, your right of action, to you under all circumstances--which
makes the carrying out of this daring scheme of yours, this
self-divorce, a matter distinctly of your choice, in which he cannot
thwart or foil you?"
Gertrude's gaze at the speaker did not relax, her eyelids did not
droop, but she took a little time before she answered.
"I will tell you what you ask. The secret of my quarrel with Gilbert
Lloyd is one which puts him in my power. He _must_ do as I choose in
every matter in which I am concerned. I am perfectly free; he is
hopelessly bound. But the agreement between us is mutual I have no
right over him, as he has none over me. I shall never recognise his
existence in any way."
"That you have the power of carrying out that resolution is the only
thing I need to know," said Mrs. Bloxam. "It makes me clear about the
advice I am going to give you. Having this perfect guarantee for his
not venturing to interfere with you, you consider yourself of course
entitled to act as if no such person as your husband were in
existence. Have you any objection to tell me whether you are disposed
to push this right of action to the extent of marrying again--of
marrying Miles Challoner, for instance?"
Mrs. Bloxam shifted her position as she asked this question, laid her
head well back against the cushion of her chair, and did not look a
Gertrude, who took longer to reply than before. When she spoke, the
words came with difficulty.
"You must have some very strong reason for asking me such a question."
"I have, my dear. Mere curiosity, or even anything short of the
necessity which exists for our understanding each other to a certain
extent, would never have induced me to ask it. Will you answer me?"
"Yes," said Gertrude, "I will. I acknowledge no limits to the extent
to which I am disposed to push my right of action. I should marry
without hesitation from motives of ambition; I should marry without
hesitation if the man were any but what he is--_if he were anyone but
Miles Challoner_."
Mrs. Bloxam sat bolt upright, and gazed at Gertrude in irrepressible,
unmixed amazement. "What do you say?" she asked. "Can it be possible
that we are all mistaken? Lord Sandilands and I, and Miles Challoner
himself, for he thinks you love him. I am as certain as I ever was of
any human being's sentiments. Have you been blind to his love, his
devotion to you? What _do_ you mean?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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