Rome -- History -- Republic, 265-30 B.C. -- Fiction
"Alas! no, Paullus, it is not your Julia. But it is one, who has perhaps
some claim to your attention; and who, at all events, will not detain you
long, on matters most important to yourself. I have intruded thus, fearing
you were about to deny me; because that which I have to say will brook no
denial."
The freedman had withdrawn abruptly the very moment that the lady entered;
and, closing the door firmly behind him, stood on guard out of earshot,
lest any one should break upon his young lord’s privacy. But Paullus knew
not this; scarce knew, indeed, that they were alone; when, as she ceased,
he made two steps forward, exclaiming in a piercing voice—
"Ye Gods! ye Gods! Lucia Orestilla!"
"Aye! Paul," replied the girl, raising her veil, and showing her beautiful
face, no longer burning with bright amorous blushes, her large soft eyes,
no longer beaming unchaste invitation, but pale, and quiet, and suffused
with tender sadness, "it is indeed Lucia. But wherefore this surprise, I
might say this terror? You were not, I remember, so averse, the last time
we were alone together."
Her voice was steady, and her whole manner perfectly composed, as she
addressed him. There was neither reproach nor irony in her tones, nor
anything that betokened even the sense of injury endured. Yet was Arvina
more unmanned by her serene and tranquil bearing, than he would have been
by the most violent reproaches.
"Alas! alas! what shall I say to you," he faltered, "Lucia; Lucia, whom I
dare not call mine."
"Say nothing, Paullus Arvina," she replied, "thou art a noble and generous
soul?—Say nothing, for I know what thou would’st say. I have said it to
myself many times already. Oh! wo is me! too late! too late! But I have
come hither, now, upon a brief and a pleasant errand. For it _is_
pleasant, let them scoff who will! I say, it _is_ pleasant to do right,
let what may come of it. Would God, that I had always thought so!"
"Would God, indeed!" answered the young man, "then had we not both been
wretched."
"Wretched! aye! most, most wretched!" cried the girl, a large bright tear
standing in either eye. "And art thou wretched, Paullus."
"Utterly wretched!" he said, with a deep groan, and buried his face for a
moment in his hands. "Even before I looked upon you, thought of you, I was
miserable! and now, now—words cannot paint my anguish, my
self-degradation!"
"Aye! is it so?" she said, a faint sad smile flitting across her pallid
lips. "Why I should feel abased and self-degraded, I can well comprehend.
I, who have fallen from the high estate, the purity, the wealth, the
consciousness of chaste and virtuous maidenhood! I, the despised, the
castaway, the fallen! But thou, thou!—from thee I looked but for
reproaches—the just reproaches I have earned by my faithless folly! I
thought, indeed, to have found you wretched, writhing in the dark bonds
which I, most miserable, cast around you; and cursing her who fettered
you!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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