"No, or I should scarcely ask your advice. If it were, my daughter
would be more at ease. Her misgivings disturb her, and then..."
Mme. Laroque sank back into the shadow of the hood over her chair and
added:
"Have _you_ any idea of what is going on in that unfortunate head?"
"None, madame."
She fixed her sparkling eyes on me for a moment, sighed deeply, and
said, gently and sadly:
"You may go ... I won’t detain you any longer."
The confidence with which I had just been honoured, had not surprised me
much. For some time it had been evident that Mlle. Marguerite reserved
for M. de Bévallan whatever sympathy she had left for humanity. But she
seemed to show rather a friendly preference than an impassioned
tenderness. And I ought to say that the preference was quite
intelligible. I have never liked M. de Bévallan, and in these pages I
have, in spite of myself, given a caricature rather than a portrait of
him, but I admit that he combines most of the qualities and defects that
are popular with women. He is absolutely devoid of modesty, which is a
great advantage, as women do not like it. He has the cool, mocking, and
witty assurance which nothing can daunt, which easily daunts others, and
which gives to its possessor a kind of domination and a factitious
superiority. His tall figure, his bold features, his skill in athletic
exercises, his reputation as a sportsman, give him a manly authority
which impresses the timid sex. And he has an air of daring, enterprise,
and conquest which attracts and troubles women, and fills their souls
with secret ardour. Such advantages, it is true, are, as a rule,
chiefly impressive to vulgar natures; but though, as usual, I had at
first been tempted to put Mlle. Marguerite’s nature on a level with her
beauty, she had for some time past seemed to make a positive parade of
very mediocre sentiments, and I believed she was capable of yielding
without resistance as without enthusiasm, and with the passive coldness
of a lifeless imagination, to the charms of a common-place lady-killer,
and, later, to the yoke of a respectable marriage.
AH this made it necessary for me to accept the inevitable, and I did so
more easily than I should have thought possible a month ago. For I had
summoned all my courage to combat the first temptations of a love,
equally condemned by good sense and by honour. And she who had
unwittingly imposed this combat on me, had also unwittingly powerfully
helped me in my resistance. If she could not hide her beauty from me,
she also unveiled her soul, and mine had recoiled. Small loss, no doubt,
for the young millionaire, but a good thing for me.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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