Artists -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Love stories; Rich people -- Fiction
"Not as an explanation of my own trouble," answered Garth; "because I
know the greatness of her nature would have lifted her far above such a
consideration. But I do indeed agree as to the complete oblivion to
self of the man in love. How else could we ever venture to suggest to a
woman that she should marry us? Ah, Brand, when one thinks of it, the
intrusion into her privacy; the asking the right to touch, even her
hand, at will; it could not be done unless the love of her and the
thought of her had swept away all thoughts of self. Looking back upon
that time I remember how completely it was so with me. And when she
said to me in the church: 'How old are you?'--ah, I did not tell you
that last night--the revulsion of feeling brought about by being turned
at that moment in upon myself was so great, that my joy seemed to
shrivel and die in horror at my own unworthiness."
Silence in the wood. The doctor felt he was playing a losing game. He
dared not look at the silent figure opposite. At last he spoke.
"Dalmain, there are two possible solutions to your problem. Do you
think it was a case of Eve holding back in virginal shyness, expecting
Adam to pursue?"
"Ah, no," said Garth emphatically. "We had gone far beyond all that.
Nor could you suggest it, did you know her. She is too honest, too
absolutely straight and true, to have deceived me. Besides, had it been
so, in all these lonely years, when she found I made no sign, she would
have sent me word of what she really meant."
"Should you have gone to her then?" asked the doctor.
"Yes," said Garth slowly. "I should have gone and I should have
forgiven--because she is my own. But it could never have been the same.
It would have been unworthy of us both."
"Well," continued the doctor, "the other solution remains. You have
admitted that the One Woman came somewhat short of the conventional
standard of beauty. Your love of loveliness was so well known. Do you
not think, during the long hours of that night,--remember how new it
was to her to be so worshipped and wanted,--do you not think her
courage failed her? She feared she might come short of what eventually
you would need in the face and figure always opposite you at your
table; and, despite her own great love and yours, she thought it wisest
to avoid future disillusion by rejecting present joy. Her very love for
you would have armed her to this decision."
The silent figure opposite nodded, and waited with clasped hands.
Deryck was pleading her cause better than she could have pleaded it
herself.
Silence in the woods. All nature seemed to hush and listen for the
answer.
Then:--"No," said Garth's young voice unhesitatingly. "In that case she
would have told me her fear, and I should have reassured her
immediately. Your suggestion is unworthy of my beloved."
The wind sighed in the trees. A cloud passed before the sun. The two
who sat in darkness, shivered and were silent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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