Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
She went hurriedly up the stoop and in. Suddenly she had the feeling
that she used to have when she had left the tense concentrated glare of
the footlights and passed into the relief of the shadowy wings. The
smiles fled from her lips, the nervous provocative mask dropped away.
She felt a mortal heaviness of accomplishment. She had lasted through
the afternoon; she had not betrayed herself. Half-way up the second
flight, she sat down abruptly, exhausted; then, straining every nerve
in her body, she reached the haven of her room, as a spent swimmer
battling for the shore.
Then a new trial. From behind her door came the sound of voices. Again
she took up her mask. The next moment Winona had sprung to her,
embracing her feverishly, crying:
"I've got it! I've got it, you darling!"
"Ah--Blainey," she said, suffering her embrace.
But Winona, not to be prevented, continued hugging her frantically,
babbling everything, all in a breath, frantic with joy and
relief--Winona, whom the night before she had held sobbing in her arms,
who to-day was the deliriously happy one!
Then she saw Snyder standing apart, and at her skirts a little girl,
half child, half baby, clinging, shyly revolted. As soon as Doré saw
her, she went forward impulsively, kneeling and holding out her arms.
The child, with the divining instinct of childhood toward suffering, to
the amazement of the others, ran swiftly into her embrace. Doré carried
her to a chair, holding her head from her, looking into the starry eyes.
"What's your name?"
"Betty."
From that moment she forgot the others. The room seemed narrowed to
their embrace, each clinging to the other. These arms, so warm against
her neck, this soft weight against her breast, filled her with
immeasurable awakening sadness, but a sadness that deadened the
consciousness of self, as if this innocence were the only affection
that could understand, the only one that could minister to her pain!
This helplessness pressing against her breast recalled her poignant
childhood, unmothered yet often in passionate grief groping for maternal
arms. If only now she could go in weakness, somewhere to confide her
crushed body weakly as a wounded child! If only the others would go and
leave her thus--
How long she remained thus she did not know. Winona went, returned and
departed. All at once Snyder was standing above them, saying:
"Sorry--time's up! Young one must be getting home to roost!"
She took her convulsively to her breast. She did not know whether it
soothed or hurt her more; only that it started within her a passionate
hunger for this innocence that responded, this incomprehension that
understood! She rose abruptly.
"Bring her often--often!" she said, turning away her face.
A knock at the door, and the black hand of Josephus extending a letter.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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