About two years before the opening of our story he had returned to San
Francisco, with a portfolio of sketches, a few hundred dollars, and a
prodigious store of canvases, paints, and brushes. He was welcomed by
the many friends who had followed his career with interest, and soon
received more orders for portraits than he could well fill. His taste
led him to prefer another branch of painting; and it was for the purpose
of studying the very beautiful scenery in the neighborhood of San
Rosario that he had established himself in the tower of the old Spanish
Mission. He was also partly induced to take this step, because he found
that home life, always irksome to him, had become, after his long
emancipation from domestic rules and regulations, wellnigh intolerable.
Graham’s character was a peculiar one, full of contradictory traits; it
might be compared to a mass of white quartz, through which ran deep
veins of the purest gold. In some respects it was a hard nature, with
certain tender qualities; and nowhere was there to be found an ounce of
base metal; a pitiless nature, which knew not how to forgive either its
own faults or those of his fellow-men. If his judgments of others were
harsh, his self-despair was sometimes fanatical. His ideal of manhood
was as pure and noble as was that of the perfect King Arthur; that he
failed a hundred times a day in living up to it, had not the effect of
lowering that ideal one hair’s-breadth. His highest duty was towards
his own soul and its struggle to reach the perfection he held it to be
capable of attaining. With the mind of an ascetic, he was endowed with
a warm, sensuous temperament, having a passionate delight in beauty,
light, and color, and capable of living through the senses with the keen
enjoyment of a Sybarite. A strain of music, a beautiful flower, or a
fair child moved him to a degree of pleasure that to any nature save an
artistic one was incomprehensible. Filled with pity at the sight of
distress, he would unhesitatingly give his last dollar to a needy
rascal; but if appealed to for sympathy by the same sinner, the
scorching contempt by which he would blast the shameful deeds for which,
to him, there was no palliation, would leave the wrong-doer a sadder if
not a wiser man. Because he expected so much of men, their
short-comings outraged him. To a man of this character it was easier,
if not better, to avoid the paths of his fellows; and his life had often
been that of a hermit, even when he dwelt in the busiest cities of the
world. Not willing that one shadow from the burden of his life should
fall upon the paths of those who cared for him, his voice and face were
always cheery when in their company. He wanted not the sympathy of man
or woman, and endured what griefs were given him to bear in silence and
alone. That divine mandate, "Bear ye one another’s burdens," was
meaningless to him; for he had ever borne his burden unsupported and
unhelped.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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