"Mother," said Brace Norton the next morning, as, none the worse for his
immersion, he stood by her side, she holding his hand the while and
gazing up into his face,--"mother, I went out yesterday with the full
intention of dreaming no more of my foolish love; and what was the
result? Strange, too," he said, with affected gaiety; "one would have
thought that an hour's immersion would have quenched it. But there, you
will, perhaps, laugh at me, and think me childish and full of folly;
still, I cannot help it--I love her more dearly than ever, and feel no
shame in owning it to you. How am I to give her up now, after holding
her to my breast as I did for a whole hour yesterday, her arms clasped
the while round my neck, and her poor head resting upon my shoulder?
Mother, it was a mingling of misery, despair, and bliss; and when, at
last, I had given up all hope of being saved--when I had struggled till
I could struggle no more--when I had called till my voice failed in my
throat--when I felt that my--our last hour was at hand, I broke faith
even with myself."
Brace paused for a few moments, for his voice was husky, but recovering
himself, he went on:
"I dare say it was wrong; but I was under the impression that all was
over. I could have saved my own life, perhaps; but I could not leave
her to perish. The sun had sunk, and darkness was fast coming on; the
evening breeze was sighing what seemed to my excited fancy a dirge
amidst the rustling reeds; and again and again some curlew flew over us
giving utterance to a loud wail. At one time it seemed so hard to die
just in the spring of life; but the next instant, as I looked down at
the poor head resting upon my breast, the sorrow was all for her, and
with that sorrow there was a strange--an awful pleasure. It was, I
should think, about ten minutes before help came that she raised her
head, and her sweet beseeching eyes looked full in mine.
"`Is there no hope?' she whispered; and I feared to tell her the cruel
truth.
"`But you could save yourself,' she faltered; `you struggled too hard
before; why should you perish in trying to save me?'
"She spoke so earnestly, and with such a sweet resignation, that the
tears came gushing from my eyes--weak, womanly tears, mother; for I am
weak, very weak, I know, or I should not tell you all this."
"Is it weak to confide all things to her who gave you birth, Brace?"
whispered Mrs Norton.
"No--no!" he replied; and then, as if recalling the scene of the
preceding evening, he continued:
"`Try,' she whispered to me--`try once more, and you may bring help.'
"As she spoke she unloosed her arms from my neck, and it was like adding
despair to despair.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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