"I know you don't, but it's all you're going to have. Look here,
Jimmy, don't be an ass! You're ill, old chap, or you will be if you go
on like this. Take my advice and hop off to bed, you'll feel a heap
better between the sheets. Can I do anything for you--anything----"
"Yes," said Jimmy sullenly. "You can--leave me to myself."
He held his hands to the fire and shivered; Sangster looked at him
silently for a moment, then he shrugged his shoulders and turned
towards the door. He was out on the landing when Jimmy called his name.
"Well?"
"Where the deuce are you going?" Jimmy demanded irritably. "Nice sort
of pal, you are, to go off and leave a chap when he's sick."
Sangster did not make the obvious reply; he came back, shutting the
door behind him. Jimmy was leaning back in his chair now; his face was
nearly as red as the dressing-gown he wore, but he shivered violently
from time to time. There was a little silence, then he opened his eyes
and smiled rather apologetically.
"Sorry to be so dull. I haven't slept for a week."
It would have been nearer the truth to say that he had hardly closed
his eyes since the night of Cynthia Farrow's death, but he knew that if
he said that Sangster would at once bark up the wrong tree, and
conclude that he was fretting for her--breaking his heart for her,
whereas he was doing nothing of the kind.
It was Christine, and not Cynthia, who was on his mind day and night,
night and day; Christine for whose sake he reproached himself so
bitterly and could get no rest. She was so young--such a child.
Every day he found himself remembering some new little incident about
her; every day some little jewel from the past slipped out of the mists
of forgetfulness and looked at him with sad eyes as if to ask:
"Have you forgotten me? Don't you remember----"
He could not help thinking of Christine's mother too; he had been fond
of her--she had mothered him so much in the old days; he wondered if
she knew how he had repaid all her kindness; what sort of a hash he had
made of life for poor little Christine.
"You'd better cut off to bed," Sangster said again bluntly.
He lit a cigarette and puffed a cloud of smoke into the air; he was
really disturbed about Jimmy. The repeated advice seemed to annoy
Jimmy; he frowned and rose to his feet; he caught his breath with a
sort of gasp of pain. Sangster turned quickly.
"What's up, old chap?"
"Only my rotten head---it aches like the very devil."
Jimmy stood for a moment with his hand pressed hard over his eyes, then
he took a step forward, and stopped again.
"I can't--I--confound it all----"
Sangster caught his arm.
"Don't be an ass; go to bed." He raised his voice; he called to
Costin; between them they put Jimmy to bed and tucked him up. He kept
protesting that there was nothing the matter with him, but he seemed
grateful for the darkness of the room, and the big pillows beneath his
aching head.
Sangster went back to the sitting-room with Costin.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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