The Second Thoughts of an Idle FellowJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
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The Second Thoughts of an Idle Fellow
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
English essays; English wit and humor
I left him to his lunch, and strolled westward, musing on the time when I
should have answered that question of his about Christmas, or any other
question, off-hand. That good youth time when I knew everything, when
life presented no problems, dangled no doubts before me!
In those days, wishful to give the world the benefit of my wisdom, and
seeking for a candle-stick wherefrom my brilliancy might be visible and
helpful unto men, I arrived before a dingy portal in Chequers Street, St.
Luke’s, behind which a conclave of young men, together with a few old
enough to have known better, met every Friday evening for the purpose of
discussing and arranging the affairs of the universe. “Speaking members”
were charged ten-and-sixpence per annum, which must have worked out at an
extremely moderate rate per word; and “gentlemen whose subscriptions were
more than three months in arrear,” became, by Rule seven, powerless for
good or evil. We called ourselves “The Stormy Petrels,” and, under the
sympathetic shadow of those wings, I laboured two seasons towards the
reformation of the human race; until, indeed, our treasurer, an earnest
young man, and a tireless foe of all that was conventional, departed for
the East, leaving behind him a balance sheet, showing that the club owed
forty-two pounds fifteen and fourpence, and that the subscriptions for
the current year, amounting to a little over thirty-eight pounds, had
been “carried forward,” but as to where, the report afforded no
indication. Whereupon our landlord, a man utterly without ideals, seized
our furniture, offering to sell it back to us for fifteen pounds. We
pointed out to him that this was an extravagant price, and tendered him
five.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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