British -- Russia -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Soviet Union -- History -- Revolution, 1917-1921 -- Fiction
At last Vera sat down in the old red arm-chair that had the holes and
the places where it suddenly went flat, and Nina piled up some cushions
and sat at her feet. For a time they were happy, saying very little,
Vera softly stroking Nina's hair. Then, as Vera afterwards described it
to me, "Some fright or sudden dread of loneliness came into the room. It
was exactly as though the door had opened and some one had joined us...
and, do you know, I looked up and expected to see Uncle Alexei."
However, of course, there was no one there; but Nina moved away a
little, and then Vera, wanting to comfort her, tried to draw her closer,
and then of course, Nina (because she was like that) with a little
peevish shrug of the shoulders drew even farther away. There was, after
that, silence between them, an awkward ugly silence, piling up and up
with discomfort until the whole room seemed to be eloquent with it.
Both their minds were, of course, occupied in the same direction, and
suddenly Nina, who moved always on impulse and had no restraint, burst
out:
"I must know how Andrey Stepanovitch (their name for Lawrence, because
Jeremy had no Russian equivalent) is--I'm going to telephone."
"You can't," Vera said quietly. "It isn't working--I tried an hour ago
to get on to Nicholas."
"Well then, I shall go off and find out," said Nina, knowing very well
that she would not.
"Oh, Nina, of course you mustn't.... You know you can't. Perhaps when
Nicholas comes in he will have some news for us."
"Why shouldn't I?"
"You know why not. What would he think? Besides, you're not going out
into the town again to-night."
"Oh, aren't I? And who's going to stop me?"
"I am," said Vera.
Nina sprang to her feet. In her later account to me of this quarrel she
said, "You know, Durdles, I don't believe I ever loved Vera more than I
did just then. In spite of her gravity she looked so helpless and as
though she wanted loving so terribly. I could just have flung my arms
round her and hugged her to death at the very moment that I was
screaming at her. Why are we like that?"
At any rate Nina stood up there and stamped her foot, her hair hanging
all about her face and her body quivering. "Oh, you're going to keep me,
are you? What right have you got over me? Can't I go and leave the flat
at any moment if I wish, or am I to consider myself your prisoner?...
_Tzuineeto, pajalueesta_... I didn't know. I can only eat my meals with
your permission, I suppose. I have to ask your leave before going to see
my friends.... Thank you, I know now. But I'm not going to stand it. I
shall do just as I please. I'm grown up. No one can stop me...."
Vera, her eyes full of distress looked helplessly about her. She never
could deal with Nina when she was in these storms of rage, and to-day
she felt especially helpless.
"Nina, dear... don't.... You know that it isn't so. You can go where
you please, do what you please."
"Thank you," said Nina, tossing her head. "I'm glad to hear it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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