British -- Russia -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Soviet Union -- History -- Revolution, 1917-1921 -- Fiction
She gave a little cry, not seeing whom it was. She was looking very
untidy, her hair loose down her back, and a rough apron over her dress.
She looked ill, and there were heavy black lines under her eyes as
though she had not slept for weeks.
Then she saw who it was and, in spite of herself, smiled.
"Genry!" she exclaimed.
"Yes," he said in a whisper, closing the door very softly behind him.
"Look here, don't scream or do anything foolish. I don't want that old
woman to catch me."
He has no very clear memory of the conversation that followed. She stood
with her back to the wall, storing at him, and every now and again
taking up a corner of her pinafore and biting it. He remembered that
action of hers especially as being absurdly childish. But the
overwhelming impression that he had of her was of her terror--terror of
everything and of everybody, of everybody apparently except himself.
(She told him afterwards that he was the only person in the world who
could have rescued her just then because she simply couldn't be
frightened of some one at whom she'd laughed so often.) She was
terrified, of course, of Grogoff--she couldn't mention his name without
trembling--but she was terrified also of the old servant, of the flat,
of the room, of the clock, of every sound or hint of a sound that there
was in the world. She to be so frightened! She of whom he would have
said that she was equal to any one or anything! What she must have been
through during those weeks to have brought her to this!... But she told
him very little. He urged her at once that she must come away with him,
there and then, just as she was. She simply shook her head at that.
"No... No... No..." she kept repeating. "You don't understand."
"I do understand," he answered, always whispering, and with one ear on
the door lest the old woman should hear and come in. "We've got very
little time," he said. "Grogoff will never let you go if he's here. I
know why you don't come back--you think we'll all look down on you for
having gone. But that's nonsense. We are all simply miserable without
you."
But she simply continued to repeat "No... No..." Then, as he urged her
still further, she begged him to go away. She said that he simply didn't
know what Grogoff would do if he returned and found him, and although
he'd gone to a meeting he might return at any moment. Then, as though
to urge upon him Grogoff's ferocity, in little hoarse whispers she let
him see some of the things that during these weeks she'd endured. He'd
beaten her, thrown things at her, kept her awake hour after hour at
night making her sing to him... and, of course, worst things, things
far, far worse that she would never tell to anybody, not even to Vera!
Poor Nina, she had indeed been punished for her innocent impetuosities.
She was broken in body and soul; she had faced reality at last and been
beaten by it. She suddenly turned away from him, buried her head in her
arm, as a tiny child does, and cried....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account