All this was before the last abandonment to despair had overwhelmed
us, Harry and me; and it was useful in helping us to a sort of
fictitious endurance. We might have succumbed sooner, otherwise, and
actually foregone our living rescue. He was so strong and hopeful; so
certain that Destiny would not have led him thus far, by such tortured
ways, only to see him founder when within sight of his goal, that some
part of his faith could not fail to communicate itself to us with
vital results. At the same time, I think, we shrunk from the merciless
expression of his triumph. _Our_ concern, in revealing the truth as we
supposed it, had been with the tragic end of his brother. Not so his.
He had no sentiment for Abel even now; no pity for the fate which had
overtaken him. The best he could find to say about him was that he had
paid the penalty and called quits, and left the better man to come
into his own. Not for himself--that was the moral reservation, after
all, which silenced and confounded us. He longed for the treasure; he
gloated in the thought of its resurrection; but now for my sake, not
his own. With the prospect of its recovery instant in his mind, he
never wavered in his intention to bestow it all on the son of the man
who had died to vindicate his honesty. I could have laughed again over
this tragic, comical, chimerical bequest to me; only tears were too
near the source of humour. It was terrible, and indecent, and pathetic
in one. _We_ sought life for no end but sweet life’s own. The rest was
a mockery.
Well, he kept us alive with it, that I believe. Even after he himself
was numbed and silenced from stimulating us, from encouraging us by
sympathy and example to prevail through hope, he would keep nodding
brightly to us to rally our spirits, until his neck got too stiff to
nod at all.
It must have been half-past six and near the time of ebb, when the
spectral dark which engulphed us knew a change. The fog, lying low on
the water, grew slowly diaphanous, waxing from a weak dawn, like
heaven seen through dying lids, to a sweet and solemn lightness. For
long we were too exhausted, body and mind, to consider what this
portended. The lightness increased; and suddenly high over the bank
shone a little red spark like a lantern. We lifted our dazed heads; we
stirred stiffly where we sat. O God! O God! what did it mean?
Swiftly it broadened, glowing like a rising fire. It mounted, or the
haze shrunk beneath it--who could tell? In a moment it was free, and
we knew it, in wonder and thankfulness, for the moon.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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