“I’m going to Scotland to-night, at once.” He found himself repeating
the summons of the letter. “Pack up my things. Order the trap.”
Howson showed no surprise. A flight from the house of death was only
natural.
Gavan, when he was gone, went to the table and closed the box of pistols
with a short, decisive snap--a decision in sharp contrast to the mist in
which his mind was steeped.
The peace the pistols promised, the peace of the northern sky and the
heather: why did he choose the latter? But then he did not choose.
Something had chosen for him. Something had called him back. Was it that
he was too weary to resist? or did all his strength consist in yielding?
He could not have told. Let the play go on. Its next act would be sweet
to watch. Of that he was sure.
PART III
I
The moor was like an amethyst under a radiant August sky, and the air,
with its harmony of wind and sunlight, was like music.
Eppie walked beside him and Peter trotted before. The forms were
changed, but it might almost have been little Eppie, the boy Gavan, and
Robbie himself who went together through the heather. The form was
changed, but the sense of saneness so strong that it would have seemed
perfectly natural to pass an arm about a child Eppie’s neck and to talk
of the morning’s reading in the Odyssey.
Never had the feeling of reality been so vague or the dream sense been
so beautiful. His instinctive choice of this peace, instead of the
other, had been altogether justified. It was all like a delightful game
they had agreed to play, and the only rule of the game was to take each
other’s illusions for granted and, in so doing, to put them altogether
aside.
It was as if they went in a dream that tallied while, outside their
dream, the sad life of waking slept. It was all limpid, all effortless,
all clear sunlight and clear wind: limpid, like a happy dream, yet
deliciously muddled too, as a happy dream is often muddled, with its
mazed consciousness that, since it is a dream, ordinary impossibilities
may become quite possible, that one only has to direct a little the
turnings of the fairy-tale to have them lead one where one will, and yet
that to all strange happenings there hovers a background of
contradiction that makes them the more of an enchanted perplexity.
In the old white house the general and Miss Barbara would soon be
expecting them back to tea, both older, both vaguer, both, to Gavan’s
appreciation, more and more the tapestried figures, the background to
the young life that still moved, felt, thought in the foreground until
it, too, should sink and fade into a tapestry for other dramas, other
fairy-tales.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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