The Skipper and the Skipped: Being the Shore Log of Cap'n Aaron SproulDay, Holman
General
The Skipper and the Skipped: Being the Shore Log of Cap'n Aaron Sproul
Day, Holman
Ship captains -- Fiction
"The first time I died," pursued his remarkable guest, "I was frozen
to death." He pulled up his trousers and showed a shank as shrunken
as a peg-leg. "All the meat came off. The second time I died, a hoss
kicked me on the head. The third time, a tree fell on me. And there
is no hell--there is no heaven. If there had been I'd have gone to
one place or the other."
"If I was runnin' either place you wouldn't," said the Cap'n, sourly.
The thin man crossed his legs and was beginning to speak, but the
first selectman broke in savagely: "Now look here, mister, this ain't
either a morgue, a receivin'-tomb, nor an undertaker's parlor. If
you want to get buried and ain't got the price I'll lend it to you.
If you want to start over again in life I'll pay for havin' your
birth-notice put into the newspaper. But you want to say what you
do want and get out of here. I've got some town business to 'tend
to, and I ain't got any time to spend settin' up with corpses."
Again the man tried to speak. Again the Cap'n interrupted. "I ain't
disputin' a thing you say," he cried. "I'm admittin' everything,
'cause I haven't got time to argue. You may have been dead nine times
like a cat. I don't care. All is, you go along. You'll find
accommodations at the tavern, the graveyard, or the town farm,
whichever hits you best. I'm busy."
But when he pulled his paper of figures under his nose again, the
thin man tapped his fleshless digit on the table.
"You're the first selectman, aren't you?" he demanded.
"That's what I be," returned the Cap'n, smartly.
"Well, then, you got to pay attention to town business when it is
put before you. I've come here on town business. I used to live in
this town."
"Was you buried here or was your remains taken away?" inquired the
Cap'n, genially, hoping that satire might drive out this unwelcome
disturber.
"Oh, I died all three times after I left this town," said the thin
man, in matter-of-fact tones. "What I'm comin' at is this: my father
gave the land to this town to build the school-house on out in the
Crymble district. Deed said if the building was ever abandoned for
school purposes for five years running, land and buildin' came back
to estate. I came past that school-house to-day and I see it hasn't
been used."
"We don't have school deestricks any more," explained the Cap'n. "We
transport scholars to the village here. That's been done for six
years and over."
"Then I claim the school-house and land," declared the thin man.
"You do, hey?"
"I do. I've got tired of travellin' round over this world, and I'm
goin' to settle down. And that school-house is the only real estate
I've got to settle down in. I'll keep bach' hall there."
"Who in thunderation are you, anyway?" demanded Cap'n Sproul,
propping himself on the table and leaning forward belligerently.
"My name is Dependence Crymble," replied the other, quietly. "My
father was Hope-for-grace Crymble. Odd names, eh? But the Crymbles
were never like other folks."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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