The Skipper and the Skipped: Being the Shore Log of Cap'n Aaron SproulDay, Holman
General
The Skipper and the Skipped: Being the Shore Log of Cap'n Aaron Sproul
Day, Holman
Ship captains -- Fiction
Mr. Tate, having plenty of leisure to meditate on those matters, had
thought of this fact before any one else in town remembered it. He
wrote another article urging that the town fittingly celebrate the
event. The Women's Temperance Workers discussed the matter and
concurred. It would give them an opportunity to have a tent-sale of
food and fancy-work, and clear an honest penny.
The three churches in town came into the project heartily. They would
"dinner" hungry strangers in the vestries, and also turn an honest
penny. The Smyrna Ancient and Honorable Firemen's Association, Hiram
Look foreman, was very enthusiastic. A celebration would afford
opportunity to parade and hold a muster.
The three uniformed secret societies in town, having an ever-lurking
zest for public exhibition behind a brass-band, canvassed the
prospect delightedly. The trustees of the Agricultural Fair and
Gents' Driving Association could see a most admirable opening for
a June horse-trot.
In fact, with those inducements and with motives regarding the
"surplus" spurring them on secretly, all the folks of Smyrna rose
to the occasion with a long, loud shout for the celebration--and
suggested that the "surplus" be expended in making a holiday that
would be worth waiting one hundred years for.
After that shout, and as soon as he got his breath, the voice of First
Selectman Aaron Sproul was heard. He could not make as much noise
as the others, but the profusion of expletives with which he
garnished his declaration that the town's money should not be spent
that way made his talk well worth listening to.
It was then that the bear-baiting began.
Every society, every church, every organization in town got after
him, and Hiram Look--a betrayal of long friendship that touched the
Cap'n's red anger into white heat--captained the whole attack.
The final clinch was in the town office, the Cap'n at bay like the
boar in its last stronghold, face livid and hairy fists flailing the
scattered papers of his big table. But across the table was Hiram
Look, just as intense, the unterrified representative of the
proletariat, his finger jabbing the air.
"That money was paid into the treasury o' this town by the voters,"
he shouted, "and, by the Sussanified heifer o' Nicodemus, it can be
spent by 'em! You're talkin' as though it was your own private
bank-account."
"I want you to understand," the Cap'n shouted back with just as much
vigor--"it ain't any jack-pot, nor table-stakes, nor prize put up
for a raffle. It's town money, and I'm runnin' this town."
"Do you think you're an Emp'ror Nero?" inquired Hiram, sarcastically.
"And even that old cuss wa'n't so skin-tight as you be. He provided
sports for the people, and it helped him hold his job. Hist'ry tells
you so."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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