The Smuggler: A Tale. Volumes I-IIIJames, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
General
The Smuggler: A Tale. Volumes I-III
James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
England -- Social life and customs -- 18th century -- Fiction; Kent (England) -- Fiction; Smugglers -- Fiction
"Oh yes, indeed I do," she answered, feeling that she was getting
further and further into difficulties; and then she added, with one of
her sudden bursts of frankness, "I will tell you how it was--candidly
and truly. Just as I was at your door, and about to knock, the memory
of several things you had said--inadvertently, perhaps--crossed my
mind; and, though I felt that I could go at any hour to consult a
friend in such terrible circumstances, I could not--no, I could not do
so with a--with one--You see what harm you have done by such fine
speeches!"
She thought, that by her last words, she had guarded herself securely
from any immediate consequences of this unreserved confession; but she
was mistaken. She merely hurried on what might yet have rested for a
day or two.
Sir Edward Digby took her other hand also, and held it gently yet
firmly, as if he was afraid she should escape from him. "Zara," he
said, "dear Zara, I have done harm, by speaking too much, or not
enough. I must remedy it by the only means in my power.--Listen to me
for one moment, for I cannot go till all is said. You must cast off
this reserve--you must act perfectly freely with me; I seek to bind
you by no engagement--I will bear my doubt; I will not construe
anything you do, as an acceptance of my suit; but you must know--nay,
you do know, you do feel, that I am your lover. It was doubt of your
own sensations towards me, that made you hesitate--it was fear that
you should commit yourself, to that which you might, on consideration,
be indisposed to ratify.--You thought that I might plead such
confidence as a tacit promise; and that made you pause. But hear me,
as I pledge myself--upon my honour, as a gentleman--that if you act
fearlessly and freely, in the cause in which we are both engaged--if
you confide in me--trust in me, and never hesitate to put yourself, as
you may think, entirely in my power, I will never look upon anything
as plighting you to me in the slightest degree, till I hear you say
the words, 'Digby, I am yours'--if ever that happy day should come. In
the meantime, however, to set you entirely free from all apprehension
of what others may say, I hold myself bound to you by every promise
that man can make; and this very day I will ask your father's
approbation of my suit. But I am well aware, though circumstances have
shown me in a marvellous short time, that your heart and mind is equal
to your beauty, yet it is not to be expected that such a being can be
won in a few short days, and that I must wait in patience--not without
hope, indeed, but with no presumption. By your conduct, at least, I
shall know, whether I have gained your esteem.--Your love, perhaps,
may follow; and now I leave you, to serve your sister and my friend,
to the best of my power."
Thus saying, he raised her hand to his lips, kissed it, and moved
towards the door.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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