Here at last was something that promised to be entertaining, and Herr
Dehnicke, who chanced to be invited too, urged her to conquer her
shyness and accept.
When the day came, Lilly was so full of dread that she would gladly
have got out of the engagement. She beheld herself running the gauntlet
of a crowd of sneering strangers, who would exchange significant
glances with each other at her expense, and narrate the history of her
rise and fall in whispers. She saw herself given the cold shoulder and
made the object of derisive remark. She went through all the tortures
of the "unclassed," and felt as if she were doomed to bear the brand of
sin on her brow till the end of her days.
She selected from her Dresden gowns the loveliest that she possessed: a
white silk embroidered with gold vine-leaves and made in the Empire
style, which in the meantime had become the height of fashion. She
wound a gold chain round her head like a diadem, and threw a filmy
Oriental richly worked veil lightly over her hair. If necessity arose,
she could use it as a covering for her bare neck and shoulders.
Finally, she felt sure that she looked hideous and abominably _outre_,
and that this alone was sufficient ground for not showing herself.
Only when her escort appeared and held on to the handle of the door
with an astounded exclamation, at the sight of her in evening dress,
did she take heart.
"Shall I do?" she asked with a timid smile, which implored approval.
He could not answer, but plunged about the room breathing heavily, and
half choking over his incoherent words. Lilly had no difficulty in
understanding what he wanted to say.
In the _coupe_, as she sat beside him, another attack of terror seized
her.
"You promise not to leave me?" she besought him. "You'll stay with me
all the time, won't you, and not allow any stranger to speak to me?"
He promised everything. They went up the four flights of stairs, an
ascent she was familiar with. The landing had been turned into a
ladies' cloak-room, where were hanging imposing furs and lace evening
coats that humbled you to the dust to look at.
She clung to his arm. "Now I'm in for it," she thought.
The big ante-room, which was always dark in the daytime and used as
kitchen, bedroom, and dining-room by Herr Kellermann, had been
transformed with fir-trees and candles into a rose-lit, fairy-tale
forest, in which couples sat close together on bamboo seats, smiling
and whispering. They were so absorbed in each other that they had no
attention to spare for the new-comers.
A tremendous reception awaited Lilly in the studio itself, which was
filled with a brilliant, glittering throng. There was a chorus of "Ah!"
then profound stillness, and a path was made, down which the pair
seemed expected to make a triumphal progress. Lilly tried to hide
behind her companion, but as he only came up to her nose she did not
succeed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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