She ran up the steps, the same steps down which eight months before she
had glided at Richard's side rocked in bliss. All a-tremble she stepped
into the dark anteroom, which had the stuffy smell of a badly aired
bedroom. Her hand almost failed her as she knocked at the studio door.
Mr. Kellermann in his breeches and slippers was squatting on the floor
beside the Turkish tabouret in exactly the same position as at her first
visit. He was busied with a coffee machine, and looked contented and
seedy.
"Mercy on us!" he said, and drew the collar of his night-shirt together.
"What signifies this sudden appearance, O noble goddess? Are the suns
setting again?"
Lilly did not reply. She laid her hat and wraps on a chair, and began to
unhook her waist, looking about for a screen. There was none.
The models who came to pose for Mr. Kellermann were not squeamish.
He jumped up and stared at her.
When he realised what she meant to do, he broke into exclamations of
delight.
"What did I say? What did I say? I said you'd come. You see! We've
reached the point at which we're screaming to be set free."
"I'm not screaming," she replied, drawing up the corners of her mouth
disdainfully. "If you please, look somewhere else."
He made a dash for the picture leaning against the wall in its blind
frame, blew the dust off, drove the wedge in tight, and adjusted the
easel, laughing all the while, and grunting:
"She came after all."
Lilly had torn off her outer garments and was pulling at the drawing
ribbon of her chemise. Her paralysed fingers could scarcely untie the
knot.
Now she stood entirely unclothed.
The garish studio light pricked her flesh painfully as with a thousand
needles.
She wanted to groan and creep into a corner, but she turned her clenched
fists outward, threw back her shoulders, and presented herself to the
painter's greedy gaze.
"Why don't you begin?" she asked. As she spoke she felt that her
smarting scorn was distorting her face.
"I'll begin immediately," he stammered, choking over each word. "I won't
utter--a syllable--or the vision will vanish. I'll begin."
He snatched up the palette, pressed the tubes, and readjusted the
picture on the easel.
He made a few strokes, then threw the brushes down. He reeled like a
drunkard.
"No use this way," he said, mumbling to himself. "You must pose."
"Just as you wish," she replied, still with that mocking smile, and
stretched out her arms like the beauty of the picture.
He was not yet satisfied, and wanted to approach her. He did not dare
to.
"I will move the mirror, so that you can see for yourself what is wrong
in your pose."
He did so.
Lilly shuddered. A strange wild animal, which was not even beautiful,
seemed to be standing there.
"Not right yet," she heard him say. "The attitude is meaningless--you've
got to know what it's for."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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