The next instant nothing had happened. He was bending over his book as
before and seemed not to notice her.
But her husband scrutinised her with watchful cunning, as if he had
found a something in her face for which he had long been searching
there.
When the train started again the colonel disposed himself to sleep. For
the sake of greater comfort he chose the unoccupied seat next to the
corridor. The stranger in order not to be opposite him instinctively
moved nearer to the centre, by this greatly diminishing the distance
between Lilly and himself. A little more and he would have been sitting
directly face to face with her.
If she had harboured an _arrière pensée_, she would have bestowed more
attention upon her husband's sleep. But all her senses were engaged in
the desire to avoid the stranger, whose proximity pricked her with a
thousand needles.
She pressed close into her corner, and spasmodically stared out of the
window, where the illuminated interior of the coach was reproduced on
the black background as in a dark mirror.
Thus she could observe the stranger quietly, without his catching her in
an occasional raising of her lids.
The light of the ceiling lamp sharply lit up his smooth, soft cheeks,
whose even sheen merged into bluish darkness at the temple, a cheek
formed for pressure and petting. To let your hand stray over it gently
must be a great delight.
And what long, dark lashes he had, longer than her own. Their shadow
formed dark semicircles reaching to the finely cut nostrils.
Suddenly he raised his eyes and looked at her.
There it was again, that black-diamond, caressing gleam, cold, yet how
seductive!
She started in fright, and grew still more frightened at the thought
that he might have noticed her fear.
He smiled a very, very faint smile and continued to read.
Her fancy wove more and more anxious, flattering thoughts about him,
thoughts tantamount to a crime, which weighed upon her like a nightmare
of which she could not rid herself.
Suddenly--an icy stream poured over her heart--she felt a soft, tender
pressure on her left foot, which she must have moved nearer to the
centre quite involuntarily, for only a short time before it had been
close against her right foot, and her right foot touched the outer wall
of the compartment.
What should she do?
A rebuking "I beg pardon!" an angry flaring up, would have roused the
colonel and given occasion again for suspicion, perhaps even for an
encounter. So she slowly withdrew her foot, using the utmost caution,
and pressed it against the wall to prove to herself she had rescued it.
But those few moments of hesitation, she knew it well, had made her
_particeps criminis_, and this consciousness tormented her as the
thought tantamount to a crime, which she had permitted to obsess her
before.
Dishonoured, besmirched, she seemed to herself, a prey to each and any
man that waylaid her path.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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