The Soul of the Soldier: Sketches from the Western Battle-FrontTiplady, Thomas
History
The Soul of the Soldier: Sketches from the Western Battle-Front
Tiplady, Thomas
World War, 1914-1918 -- Personal narratives, English
On the evening before, our guest--a young lieutenant--was to go on
leave, he got very uneasy. As gulls scent the approach of stormy
weather and come inland, or blackbirds and larks feel the approach of
winter and migrate to summer lands, so men can sometimes scent danger
and coming death. He had with him a bottle of whisky, and he kept it on
the table outside my tent--a safe place for it.
"I don’t mind telling you, Padre," he said, as he poured out a glass,
"I’ve got the ’wind-up’ badly to-night. I don’t like the feel of
things. I would rather be in the trenches than here, because I know
what is likely to happen there, but here in the open I feel strange and
unprotected. I shall be glad when it is morning."
His feeling was quite natural. We always feel another man’s dangers
more than our own because they are new to us and we don’t know what to
expect or how to meet them. A man will choose a big danger that he is
used to, sooner than a lesser danger that is new to him. Besides, the
lieutenant had his "leave-warrant" in his breast pocket and that will
sap any man’s courage. He has a feeling that the shells are after his
"leave-warrant" and that the gunners know where it is. He suspects that
fate is malignant and takes a special delight in killing a man when he
is on the way to "Blighty." Many a man has been killed with a
"leave-warrant" in his pocket, or "commission papers" in it which were
taking him home.
Our doctor told me how one night he and the chaplain who preceded me
were riding on the front of an ambulance car when a shell burst and with
a fragment killed the chaplain. In the padre’s pocket was his warrant,
and he was taking his last ride before going home; but instead of going
home in "Blighty" he went to his _long_ home, and the warrant lies in
the grave with him. A man feels particularly vulnerable when the
long-looked-for "leave-warrant" is in his pocket. He does not fear
death after "leave," but he does on the eve of "leave." He wants one
more look at his home and loved ones before going on the long and lone
journey which, despite all the comfort which the Christian religion
gives, still retains much of its terror to the human spirit. There have
been few better Christians than Samuel Johnson and John Bunyan, but
neither of them could contemplate fording the river of death without
misgivings. When they came to it they found it much less formidable
than they had expected. Had they been at the Front with
"leave-warrants" in their pockets to "Fleet Street, London," or "Elstow,
Bedford," I fancy neither of them would have taken undue risks.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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