The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 2, October, 1834Various
General
The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 2, October, 1834
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
He had been blind from the age of three years. "I know not," said he,
as he related these particulars to Lucille one evening when they were
alone; "I know not what the earth may be like, or the heaven, or the
rivers whose voice at least I can hear, for I have no recollection
beyond that of a confused, but delicious blending of a thousand
glorious colors--a bright and quick sense of joy--A VISIBLE MUSIC. But
it is only since my childhood closed that I have mourned, as I now
unceasingly mourn, for the light of day. My boyhood passed in a quiet
cheerfulness; the least trifle then could please and occupy the
vacancies of my mind; but it was as I took delight in being read
to,--as I listened to the vivid descriptions of poetry,--as I glowed at
the recital of great deeds,--as I was made acquainted by books, with
the energy, the action, the heat, the fervor, the pomp, the enthusiasm
of life, that I gradually opened to the sense of all I was forever
denied. I felt that I existed, not lived; and that, in the midst of the
Universal Liberty, I was sentenced to a prison, from whose blank walls
there was no escape. Still, however, while my parents lived, I had
something of consolation; at least I was not alone. They died, and a
sudden and dread solitude--a vast and empty dreariness settled upon my
dungeon. One old servant only, who had nursed me from my childhood, who
had known me in my short privilege of light, by whose recollections my
mind could grope back its way through the dark and narrow passages of
memory, to faint glimpses of the sun, was all that remained to me of
human sympathies. It did not suffice, however, to content me with a
home where my father and my mother's kind voice were _not_. A restless
impatience, an anxiety to move, possessed me; and I set out from my
home, journeying whither I cared not, so that at least I could change
an air that weighed upon me like a palpable burthen. I took only this
old attendant as my companion; he too died three months since at
Bruxelles, worn out with years. Alas! I had forgotten that he was old,
for I saw not his progress to decay; and now, save my faithless dog, I
was utterly alone, till I came hither and found _thee_."
Lucille stooped down to caress the dog; she blest the desertion that
had led to a friend who never could desert.
But however much and however gratefully St. Amand loved Lucille, her
power availed not to chase the melancholy from his brow, and to
reconcile him to his forlorn condition.
"Ah, would that I could see thee! Would that I could look upon a face
that my heart vainly endeavors to delineate."
"If thou couldst," sighed Lucille, "thou wouldst cease to love me."
"Impossible!" cried St. Amand, passionately; "however the world may
find thee, _thou_ wouldst become my standard of beauty, and I should
judge not of thee by others, but of others by thee."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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