The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 4, December, 1834Various
History
The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. I., No. 4, December, 1834
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
The other qualities, gentleness, benevolence, purity, rectitude,
courtesy and politeness, when accompanied by good sense and a well
cultivated mind, constitute the great charm of domestic and social
life. Indeed, they may well be called indispensable requisites, since
there can be no happiness and very little comfort without them. There
never was a greater, a more fatal mistake, than the too common one of
supposing that the chief use of such qualities is in society at large;
in other words, when we are acting a part before the world, in our
ridiculous struggles for distinction and power. Selfishness is the
mainspring of all such efforts, and it so sharpens our sagacity as to
convince us that our bad qualities _must_ be restrained in public, or
they will frequently subject us to punishment if we attempt to disturb
others by their indulgence. But in private life, and particularly in
the family circle, there are few so insignificant or destitute of means
to disturb others as not to possess the power of causing much
annoyance, if not actual unhappiness. A single individual of a waspish,
irritable, jealous, gossipping, envious and suspicious temper, in these
situations, may destroy the peace and poison the domestic enjoyments of
a large family. No incident is too trivial to excite some one or other
of their bad passions; no person too unoffending to provoke them; no
conduct so guarded as to escape malignant remark. Their approach, like
the sirocco of the desert, produces an irresistible depression of
spirits; constraint and embarrassment spread a gloom over every
countenance, and the voice of joy and gladness dies away in their
presence. On the other hand, the emanations of a gentle, benevolent
disposition, produce the same impression on our hearts, that the balmy
breezes and sweet smelling flowers of the vernal season do on our
senses. It is a something that we feel deeply in the inmost recesses of
our bosom, but cannot well describe. It is an atmosphere of delight in
which we would gladly breathe during our whole life.
By purity of thought and rectitude of conduct, in which are
comprehended the inestimable virtues of truth, candor and sincerity, we
secure for ourselves the unutterable enjoyment of an approving
conscience, at the same time that we obtain from others their esteem,
their admiration, and their love. We may manifest these qualities in
every part of our intercourse with others; for whether we speak or act,
occasions continually present themselves to prove that we possess them.
By conversation we show the purity of our sentiments; by conduct we
manifest the rectitude of our principles--so that in all we either say
or do, we supply others with the means of ascertaining what manner of
persons we are. True we may deceive some by playing the hypocrite; but
the persons whose good opinion is really worth gaining, are not so
easily gulled, and our loss, if the game is once seen through, is
irretrievable.
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