The Southern Literary Messenger, Volume I., 1834-35Various
General
The Southern Literary Messenger, Volume I., 1834-35
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
Their conversation was a routine of
insipid frivolity and angry disputes. With no definite principles of
economy or of morals, he wasted his fortune and wrecked his health
over the bottle and at cards--excitements, the usual resource of a
weak, ill-cultivated understanding. She is now a widow, scantily
endowed, at the age of twenty-seven. Her mind, too much engrossed by
her darling pursuit to have learned, even in the impressive school of
adversity, is nearly a blank as to all useful knowledge: imagination,
paramount there over every other faculty, is prolific of innumerable
fooleries; she can do no work beyond crimping a ruff or making a
frill: and her nerves, _shattered_ by tea, late hours, and sentimental
emotion at fictitious scenes, threaten a disordered intellect and a
premature grave.
To this impertinent adage, about _example_ and _precept_, is it
chiefly owing that I am at this moment a bachelor, aged fifty. I used
it to parry the repeated instances made me by a friendly senior
bachelor, to be "up and a doing," in the journey towards matrimony. As
the proverb commonly silenced him, it appeared to me at last, as it
does to most people, a satisfactory answer; it was the lullaby, with
which I hushed into repose every transient qualm that his
expostulations excited. My friend at length, in reasonable time, took
me at my word, and added example to precept: he married, well and
happily. But one obstacle or other, real or imaginary, had by this
time confirmed me in my inactivity. Business occupied my time:
chimerical visions of female excellence, in spite of my better reason,
haunted me from the regions of romance, and made me hard to be
pleased, even by merits which I was obliged to confess were superior
to my own: courtship, by being long in view yet long deferred, came at
length to appear clothed in embarrassment and terror: a failure,
resulting (as vanity whispered,) purely from the awkwardness produced
by embarrassment and terror, finally crushed all matrimonial
aspirations: and, as it is now absurd to hope for a _love-match_, (a
genuine novel-reader can brook no other) I am e'en trying to resign
myself to the doom of perpetual celibacy.
'Twere needless to multiply examples. These suffice to shew, not only
how absurd in reasoning, but how hurtful often in practice it is, to
consider advice as at all the _less good_, for not being enforced by
the giver's example. That proverb has done as much harm in the world
as the doctrine of the Pope's infallibility, or of the divine right of
kings; or as the silly saying, "_stuff a cold, and starve a fever;_"
or, as (by its perversion) that unfortunate one, "_spare the rod, and
spoil the child._"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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