The Southern Literary Messenger, Volume I., 1834-35Various
General
The Southern Literary Messenger, Volume I., 1834-35
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
Before the appointed time, Heywood returned. He had undergone a
purification, which somewhat improved his looks, and he bore no
evidence of having increased his potations. We had a long, and to us
highly interesting conversation; but Heywood was not the man he had
been; the mind--that glorious mind had suffered in the wreck. It is
true he was occasionally eloquent, grand in his conceptions, pouring
out burning thoughts, and exhibiting amazing knowledge; but there was
a want of solidity and continuity in his discourse, and there were
abrupt starts from deep pathos, when he touched upon his situation, to
a wild and reckless jocularity that made me shudder. I had determined
in my own mind, difficult and delicate as I felt the task to be, to
strive to the utmost to reclaim him. It was a sacred duty devolving on
me as a friend; it was a conscientious duty belonging to me as a man;
and I felt if I could turn such a being from the path of evil, and
lead him once again to the high and honorable station he was by his
talents so eminently entitled to, it would be a deed whose reward even
here would be inappreciable, and might plead against a thousand errors
at the judgment seat of a righteous God. It required great tact,
however, to approach the subject, for his sensitiveness was very keen,
and I knew if I offended him there, I should lose my hold upon him;
therefore I waited until he himself should give me an opportunity of
entering on the subject. None occurred that night. Occasionally, as I
have said, he would advert to himself and his present miserable
situation, but in such a manner as deprived me of courage to speak
upon the subject. At one time he observed, when Drayton's name had
been mentioned, "It is somewhat strange S----, that man seems to have
been born to supplant me. Who would have thought it? The quiet, easy,
dull Charles Drayton, to supplant Morriss Heywood! Why, in the
exuberance of my youthful vanity, I should have thought my wings beat
an atmosphere too refined and rare, to sustain his heavy weight; that
my eyes looked unwinking on a light that would have seared his duller
optics. And yet he reached me, and he passed me. And while I descended
in rapid whirls, until I grovelled in the very dust, he sustained his
flight and held aloft his station. Yes, he supplanted me in my
profession--supplanted me in public life--supplanted me in love. Ha!
ha! ha! It is a strange tale to tell. What would our college mates say
to it? What _does_ the world say to it? I know what it says. No
matter,
'They can't but say I had the crown;
I was not fool.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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