Dorset (England) -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction; Textile industry -- Fiction
"Things prevented it. We must choose the right moment to spring this.
It's bound to knock them over for a minute. I'm thinking it all out.
Probably you don't quite realise, Sabina, what this means from their
point of view. The first thing is to get my aunt on my side; Daniel's
hopeless, of course."
She stared at him.
"What in God's name has come over you? You talk as though you hadn't a
drop of blood in your veins. Were you deaf yesterday? Didn't you hear me
tell you I was with child by you? 'Their point of view'! What about my
point of view?"
"Don't get excited, my dear girl. Do give me credit for some sense. This
is a very ticklish business, and the whole of our future--yours, of
course, quite as much as mine--will depend on what I do during the next
few days. Do try to realise that. If I make a mistake now, we may repent
it for fifty years."
"What d'you call making a mistake? What choice of action have you got if
you're a gentleman? It kills me--kills me to hear you talking about
making a mistake; and your hard voice means that you think you've made
one. What have I done but love you with all my heart and soul? What have
I ever done to make you put other people's points of view before mine?"
"I'm not--I'm not, Sabina."
"You are. You used to understand me so well and know what was in my mind
before I spoke, and now--now before this--the greatest thing in the
world for me--you--"
"Talk quietly, for goodness' sake. You don't want all Bridetown to hear
us."
"You can say that? And you go out walking with a child and--"
"Look here, Sabina, you must pull yourself together, or else you stand a
very good chance of bitching up our show altogether," he answered
calmly. "This thing has got to be carried out by me, not you; and if you
are not going to let me do it my own way, then so much the worse for
both of us. I won't be dictated to by you, or anybody, and if you're not
contented to believe in me, then I can only say you're making a big
mistake and you'll very soon find it out."
"What are you going to do, then?" she asked, "and when are you going to
do it? I've a right to know that, I suppose?"
"To think you can talk in that tone of voice to me--to me of all
people!"
"To think you can force me to! And now you'll say you've seen things in
me you never thought were there, and turn it over in your mind--and--and
oh, it's cowardly--it's cruel. And you call yourself an honourable man
and could tell me and swear to me only yesterday that I was more to you
than anything else in the world!"
"D'you know what you're doing?" he asked. "D'you want to make
me--there--I won't speak it--I won't come down to your level and forget
myself and say things that I'd break my heart to think of afterwards. I
must go now, or that girl will be wondering what the deuce has happened.
She's told her father already that you weren't happy or something; so I
suppose you must have been talking. I'll come in this evening. You'd
better go home now as quick as you can."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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