“The Americans have been tinkering with a proposed new set of rules,” the Author said, “and one of their suggested rules prohibits a practice swing anywhere except on the tee. That would govern this case.” “Ah yes, but what about our own code?” the Colonel said. “The practice stroke is not forbidden,” the M.P. observed after careful reference to the rules, “but I remember that on one occasion a very similar point was submitted to the Rules Committee, and they said that such a thing was so obviously contrary to the spirit of the game that they had not thought it necessary to legislate upon the point. And they have not done so, and”-- “That is so, and they were quite right,” the Colonel interrupted hurriedly, “because this is golf, and we cannot have rules in our code to say that men must not cheat, and the penalties for doing so. It would be too much of a reflection on us as gentlemen and golfers. But here is a most exceptional case, where advantage is taken of the omission, and Lazarus appeals to the law and the law only. He will stand by the law--the strict letter of it.” “I believe he must have his money,” the Author said. “It is the law,” said the M.P. “I think so,” put in the Parson. “Then, Septimus,” the Colonel concluded, “will you kindly tell your friend Lazarus that he may send a chartered accountant round to Dives’ headquarters to examine his financial position, with a view to a proper apportionment of his estate on the basis of nineteen parts to Dives and one part to Lazarus? And you had better tell the new record-holder at the same time that we don’t like this sort of thing, and we expect him to keep to his statement that he will not play the game again. He will have the fever on him after that 68, and with a few thousands a year at his disposal he will be after getting into all the clubs. I know these renunciations of golf. I have renounced myself--hundreds of times!” At this moment the door opened and the steward entered to say that luncheon was ready. “Splendid!” exclaimed the Colonel. “Gentlemen, the court is closed!” V Golf remained impossible in the afternoon, and the M.P. filled up his time by working out some golf statistics with a view to indicating to the ignorant public what was comprised in a year of golf. “You see,” he said, “sooner or later some of the very high authorities will find it to be necessary to take very serious notice of this game, of the number of people whose time it claims, of the land it engages, of the capital sunk in it, and of the enormous current expenditure upon it. Golf has really become a considerable factor in the social scheme of this country, and this must be recognised by legislators. I see that the Union authorities at Wirral have been giving some attention to the matter, with the result that they have jumped on the Royal Liverpool Club with an enormously increased assessment. The process of milking the golfer will begin soon.”