For her, the change would simply deliver her, blind and bound, into
Eliza’s hand. She could have laughed as she saw how the thing she had
fought against all her life had captured her at last. Even with Eliza
dead or gone, Blindbeck would still have stifled her as with
unbreathable air. Her spirit and Eliza’s would have lived their battles
again, and even over a grave she would have suffered and struggled
afresh. But Eliza was neither dead nor mercifully removed, but was
already snuffing the battle-smoke from afar. The whole account of their
lives would come up in full, and be settled against the under-dog for
good. It was as whipping-boy to Eliza that she would go to the house by
Blindbeck gates.
At the present moment, however, she neither suffered nor rebelled.
Physically, she had reached the point at which the mind detaches itself
resolutely from further emotional strain. The flame of hate burnt
steadily but without effort, and with almost as pure a light as the
flame of love itself. Like all great passions, it lifted her out of
herself, lending her for the time being a still, majestic strength.
There is little to choose at the farthest point of all between the
exaltation of holiness and the pure ecstasy of hate. To the outside eye
they show the same shining serenity, almost the same air of smiling
peace. It is the strangest quality in the strange character of this
peculiarly self-destroying sin. Because of it she was able to go about
her evening tasks with ease, to speak gently to Simon in the little
scene which had just passed, and even to dwell on his methods with a
humorous smile upon her lips.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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