He was sorry for Rada, and he was sorry for himself as well, for he
saw at once where lay his duty. He knew even now what he would have
to do. There must be no imputation of unfairness against him: he was
bound, by the force of circumstances, to a contest with the girl, but
he would fight in the open. She had issued the challenge with all
the advantage on her side, but he felt no animosity against her for
this: she had spoken just as she, a wayward, impulsive girl, might
have been expected to speak. His only trouble was that she should
have grounds for thinking ill of him.
He no longer felt bashful and shy in her presence. So much, at
least, was in his favour. He seemed to know and understand her
better for having seen the squalor and wretchedness of her home, for
having realised the surroundings in which she lived. Then the
Willis's had spoken so freely of her, almost every day, encouraged,
of course, by Mostyn; he had felt at last that he had known the girl
for years, and that her vagaries were no new thing to him.
Perhaps he knew her better than she knew herself; so Mostyn, who had
had no experience of women, told himself in his conceit. It was all
very well for her to pretend to be hard and wayward and selfish: he
knew better. He knew what reason the villagers had for loving her;
why, only yesterday old Mrs. Oldham at the post office had told him
how Rada had given up days and days to nurse a little child who was
ill with bronchitis, and who might have died of it had it not been
for Rada's care of her. "If I could make her see herself and show
herself to me in her true character," Mostyn muttered, "then we might
be--well, friends, as well as rivals. If I could!"
Unfortunately, as well as having no knowledge of women, Mostyn was
not possessed of much tact. And so, as usual, he blundered
egregiously when he attempted to put his ideas into practice.
"I think, Mr. Clithero," Rada began, "that you have taken a very mean
way of revenging yourself upon me. I thought you would have had more
manly feelings----"
He knew what she meant, but he was in such a hurry to defend himself
that he failed to find the words he wanted.
"I was rude to you the other night," Rada went on relentlessly. "I
was rude to you at the Derby. I couldn't help myself. I always say
just what comes into my head."
Mostyn was quite aware of this, but he did not mean to say so; he
wanted to be very gentle with Rada, quite unconscious that gentleness
was the one thing which in her present temper she would resent. "I
don't think you meant to hurt," he said softly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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