He read the letter over and over again, very possibly a hundred times if
one might judge from the time it remained in his hands. At last he put
it down quietly, as if afraid it would make a noise, and stared at the
small embryo fire. He then paced across the room; lay down on the sofa;
resumed his seat at the fire; took up the letter, again perused it, and
again slowly laid it down. He alone could decipher his own thoughts
while doing all this. For a time he was confused and bewildered, as if
endeavouring to comprehend his altered position. It was to him as if
some one whom he had hanged or murdered had come to life again. What
was he to do now with reference to the Sergeant? This was what puzzled
him--what could be done to save himself? He had felt safe in the hands
of an honourable man--at a distance. He had in fact, during many years
of comparative ease as to worldly things, almost forgotten his old
attempt at cheating. He had long ago repented, as he thought, of his
crime; but that which was past had now risen from the dead, and God
seemed to require it at his hands!
Had not his own continued sinfulness thus restored the dead past to
life?
It was a great shock for him to learn for the first time that his enemy,
as he looked upon Adam, knew it all, and had him in his power. And then
to learn also that the Sergeant had never divulged the secret! What
could Smellie now do? Would he provoke Adam to blast his character, to
triumph over him, to expose him to the Kirk Session and the parish? nay,
to--to banish him? Or would he repent truly of all that false, hollow
past which was now being dimly revealed to him; confess his evil-doing
to the Sergeant, and ask his forgiveness, as well as that of God; trust
his mercy, bless him for his generosity, acknowledge that he was the
better man, and seek by a new and true life to imitate him? O Mr.
Smellie! this is indeed one of those moments in thy life in which a
single step to the right or left may lead thee to light or to darkness,
to heaven or to hell. Thy soul, of immeasurable littleness estimated by
the world, but of infinite greatness estimated by eternal truth and
righteousness, is now engaged in a battle in which its eternal destiny
is likely to be determined! Confront then the good and evil masters,
God and Mammon, who are contending for the mastery; serve the one and
despise the other, and even thou mayest yet be great because good. But
if not!--then in a few minutes mayest thou be irrecoverably on the road
to thine own place; and though this will be nothing to Drumsylie, it
will be everything to thee!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account