We left the mountains at the beginning of October, but my home-coming
was marked by a very painful circumstance--I was sent to school! I went,
of course, only as a day scholar; and it goes without saying that I was
never allowed to go and come alone lest I should get into bad company.
The four years that I spent at the university, as a day scholar, were
as strange and as full of odd experiences as any of my life. But,
notwithstanding, from that fatal day my history becomes much less
interesting as a narrative.
I was taken to school for the first time, at two o'clock in the
afternoon, upon one of those glorious October days, so sunny and
peaceful, that is like a reluctant and sad leave-taking of the
summer-time. Ah! how beautiful it had been in the mountains, in the
leafless forests and among the autumn-tinted vines!
With a crowd of children, all talking at the same time, I entered the
torture chamber. My first impression was one of astonished disgust
because of the hideousness of the ink-stained walls, and of the old
benches of shiny wood defaced by the penknife carvings of countless
school-boys who had been so inexpressibly miserable in this place.
Although I was a stranger to my new companions they treated me with the
greatest familiarity (they used thee and thou in addressing me) and gave
themselves patronizing airs that were almost impertinent. Although I
observed my school-mates timidly and furtively I thought them, for the
most part, exceedingly ill-mannered and untidy.
As I was twelve and a half I entered the third class; my tutor
considered me advanced enough to keep up with it if I chose to do so,
although I myself felt that I was scarcely equal to the task. The first
day, for the purpose of qualifying, we had to write Latin exercises, and
I remember that my father awaited, with some anxiety, the outcome of the
examination. When I told him I was second among fifteen I was surprised
that he attached so much importance to a matter of so little interest
to me. It was all one to me! Broken hearted as I felt, how could I be
affected by such a trifle?
Later, indeed, at no time, did I feel the impetus that the desire to
excel brings with it. To be at the foot of the class always seemed to me
the least of the ills that a school-boy is called upon to endure.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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