Thus two young women in that seemingly tranquil house retired to their
rooms with hearts high-beating, moved to their inmost depths by Charley
Meredith, who was not in the least worthy of the agitation of either,
not even of Janet’s half-guilty agitated excitement which she thought
love, and certainly not of the emotion which made Gussy Harwood hide her
face in her hands, in humiliation and misery which all the sweetness of
their recent interview could not overcome. It was sweet: and his implied
assurance of the cause that kept him silent, and certainty of a definite
term to the suspense, had flooded her being with happiness for the
moment; but by the time she had gained the privacy of her own room, and
the excitement was over, Gussy’s heart once more had sunk into the
depths. To wait in this humiliating way till he should signify his
pleasure, to be dependent upon him for something like life itself, to
attend like a handmaiden on his leisure and his choice of a time and
manner of signifying his will--all this filled Gussy with humiliation
and shame, still more deeply felt in that her consciousness was pervaded
by it, and she felt, even while she revolted, that her happiness was in
his hands, and that she could not escape. He was not a man of great
qualities, there was nothing in him to make him worthy of being the
arbiter of a life. And yet, so he was.
Janet went to bed, but she found that, with all these fumes of
excitement hanging about her, she could not sleep. If she dozed for a
few minutes she was again with Meredith, walking along wonderful dark
passages, peering through half-opened doors, seeing dreadful
visions--sometimes of coffins and dead people, sometimes of threatening
faces looking out upon her.
In the end Janet jumped out of bed again and lighted a candle. She had
suddenly thought she heard some one touch the handle of her door, and a
sudden vision--the face of the old man with his white beard seemed to
spring out of the darkness before her. After all, there were but a few
doors between them, doors which were sometimes left unsecured. What if,
waking like herself in the middle of the night, the prisoner should find
a practicable way as she had done, and come out and pass through her
door as she had done through his? The impression of some one standing
beside her bed was so strong upon her in the dark, that Janet made but
one spring to the opposite side, and trembling, managed, though with
difficulty, to strike a match.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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