Marriage -- Fiction; Runaway husbands -- Fiction; Social settlements -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
Jim was kneeling, far up toward the altar, his head in his hands. In all
the big church, which was bleak and bare in the cold afternoon light,
there was no one else. The red altar light flickered in its hanging
glass cup; a dozen lighted candles, in a great frame that held sockets
for five times as many, guttered and flared at the rail.
Minutes slipped by, and still the man knelt there motionless, and still
the woman sat watching him, her eyes brilliant and tender, her heart
flooded with a poignant happiness that carried before it all the
bitterness of the years. Julia felt born again. Like a person long deaf,
upon whose unsealed ears the roar of life bursts suddenly again, she
shrank away from the rush of emotion that shook her. It was
overpowering--dizzying--exhausting.
When Jim presently passed her she shrank into the shadow of her pillar,
but his face was sadder and more grave than Julia had ever seen it, and
he did not raise his eyes. She listened until his echoing footsteps died
away on the stairs; then the smile on her face faded, and she sank on
her knees and burst into tears.
But they were not tears of sorrow; instead, they seemed to Julia
infinitely soothing and refreshing. They seemed to carry her along with
the restful sweep of a river. She cried, hardly knowing that she cried,
and with no effort to stop the steady current of tears.
And when she presently sat back and dried her eyes, a delicious ease and
relaxation permeated her whole body. Like a convalescent, weak and
trembling, she drew great breaths of air, rejoicing that the devastating
fever and the burning illusions were gone, and only the quiet weeks of
getting well lay before her.
She sat in the church a long time, staring dreamily before her. Odd
thoughts and memories drifted through her mind now: she was again a
little girl of eight, slipping into the delicatessen store in O'Farrell
Street for pickles and pork sausage; now she was a bride, with Jim in
New York, moving through the dappled spring sunlight of Fifth Avenue, on
the top of a rocking omnibus. She thought of the settlement house:
winter rain streaming down its windows, and she and Miss Toland dining
on chops and apple pie, each deep in a book as she ate; and she
remembered Mark, poor Mark, who had crossed her life only to bring
himself bitter unhappiness, and to leave her the sorrow of an
ineffaceable stain!
Only thirty, yet what a long, long road already lay behind her, how much
sorrow, how much joy! What mistakes and cross purposes had been tangled
into her life and Jim's, Mark's and Richie's, Barbara's and Sally's and
Ted's--into all their lives!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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