Mackie was all right, and, oh dear! _wasn't_ Mr. Mackie funny?
Louie thought this Mr. Mackie more than funny; in her inexperience of
the type she could never believe he was quite true. For Mr. Mackie
sang songs, imitated music-hall artistes, could "gag" for a whole day
on end, and never forget for a moment the immense success he was. He
fascinated Louie. "Ladies and bipeds in trousers!" he would begin,
with rapid gestures and still more rapid speech, "before the applause
I am waiting for has had time to subside--good word, subside--(thank
you, Cuthbert, you can take the bouquet round to the stage-door)--as I
was saying when Fitzclarence interrupted me, ladies and tripeheads in
blouses, whoa, backpedal, never mind--as I was saying, I will now
endeavour to give you my celebrated imitation of Roderigo the
gasfitter at one o'clock on a Saturday with the thirty bob in his
pocket and Hildegarde Ann his wife licking the paint of the lamp-post
at the corner to squench her thirst--_heu_, her thirst!... Chord on,
please, titillate the catgut, Professor, and take firm hold of his
hand, girls----"
Then, while the eyes of Lord Moone's niece would grow bigger and
bigger, would follow the performance.
"_Isn't_ he funny!" Kitty would giggle, faint with laughing; "oh, give
us some more, Mr. Mackie!"
And Kitty, like Saint Paul, died daily at yet another trick of Mr.
Mackie's--the putting of his handkerchief to his nose, and the drawing
of it slowly downwards to the accompaniment of a piercing whistle.
But Louie was only moderately amused by young Merridew. Mr. Mackie had
his own perfection; but vulgarity _with_ a tennis-lawn! "Good
gracious, no," said Louie.
She had entered the School as a day student; but within a week she had
put her name down for the evening classes also. Even then she had the
evenings of Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and the whole of Sunday
quite unamusingly on her hands. She did not want time on her hands. As
much Mr. Mackie as you pleased, but no time on her hands. So she
joined the classes that met on the evenings of Mondays, Wednesdays and
Fridays.
On her very first evening she saw a student whom she had not seen
before.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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