I daresay her brother Matt did what was the best for her. He laid his
hand on her shoulder and bade her quietly come home. He had looked on
in perplexed silence for the last few minutes, while he unscrewed his
flute slowly, and put it away in his pocket. He did not try now to say
anything comforting, but held his sister up in his strong grasp, for
she was trembling too much to stand alone, and he led her away, her
face hidden in her cloak.
There were no more carols sung that year at Wyncliffe. A blank silence
fell upon those who were left. Presently some one said, 'Poor Hildred!'
They asked who brought the news, and Esther dried her eyes and began
eagerly to tell all she knew. I stood listening with the rest. It was
not much to hear, though told in many words. David Moore had come
back wounded from India, to his home at the ferry-house. He was in
Cuthbert's regiment, and he brought word that Cuthbert had been killed.
'Poor Cuthbert!' said many sorrowful voices. They all loved him. Not
one here but thought of him kindly, and had been friends with him in
the days that were gone. And I. Oh Cuthbert, God knows I loved you, God
knows I mourned for you, bitterly, bitterly.
It was ended then, the long hope, the fear we would not name, the
watching for him who was never to come back. It was all over, and he
was dead.
Dead! that was a hard thing to believe. For there was no farewell to
remember, no day to look back upon as the last day of his life; no
single parting word; only a great blank and silence in our thoughts.
He had been, and he was not. That was all. We should never know for
certain the day nor the hour when we lost him. Only on some day, long
ago now, when thinking nothing, we were busy about our common work, he
had been dying a soldier's painful death, with perhaps a farewell word
for us in his brave heart, that would never reach us.
It had always seemed as if we feared so much, but we knew now how far
stronger than our fears our hope had been. The blow could scarcely have
fallen more heavily months ago, before we began to have the vague dread
of evil that had darkened into utter night.
I thought it all over as I went slowly homewards, with a dull quietness
that it was very strange to feel. I remembered him as a boy, and could
recall his great love to me, without more than a numb heartache, and a
feeling of wonder that I was not more unhappy.
I thought of a future in which I should be always lonely, and Hildred
for ever broken-hearted, with a sort of pity for us both, as if I were
but a looker-on at our lives.
And yet I envied Hildred; for when I went late at night to ask after
her, they told me that she had sobbed herself to sleep. For the moment
she had escaped from trouble, and her stormy sorrow all left behind,
she had gone away into the land of dreams, where tears are not.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account