The Strand Magazine, Vol. 05, Issue 29, May 1893: An Illustrated MonthlyVarious
General
The Strand Magazine, Vol. 05, Issue 29, May 1893: An Illustrated Monthly
Various
English literature -- Periodicals; Short stories, English -- Periodicals
Slowly and with downcast eyes the ghost crept out through the bookcase
and rejoined Jemmy and Bill to assist in disposing of the swag. They
lavished upon him terms of endearment, and insisted on treating him at
every public-house in the neighbourhood: and the sight of that
respectably-dressed old gentleman with kid gloves and a short clay pipe
surprised the pot-boys. The ghost could not consume the liquor, being
too unsubstantial. At short intervals he would retire into a dark corner
to beat his breast in remorse and anguish.
Presently Jemmy and Bill, who had been whispering earnestly together,
turned respectfully to the spectre; they appeared very nervous, as
though afraid to broach some delicate matter which was on their minds.
"Beg parding, boss--I mean my lordship"--began Jemmy, hesitatingly, and
fidgeting from one foot to the other; "but we was a-going to ask yer if
as how you'd 'ave enny objection----"
"Yus," chimed in Bill. "If ye'd take the 'uff if so be as we wos to----"
"Dry up, you, Bill," said Jemmy. "It's just this 'ere, guvnor. We wos
a-thinkin' of crackin' another crib next week as yer might ha' heered ov
in yer time--well, to bust out with it straight and candid, it's yer own
crib as used to be w'en yer wos alive; but, yer see, bein' as how ye're
dead now and it ain't o' no more good to yer--there's a nice little lot
of old plate as you've got there as we sho'd be proud to 'andle. The
on'y thing is----"
"Yus, that's w'ere it is," interrupted Bill. "The o'ny thing is as we
might 'ave to knock yer missis--axin' pardon; 'er ladyship--on the 'ed,
bein' a light sleeper, her maid ses, and a bit ov a spitfire, d'ye see?"
The judge's ghost attempted to give vent to a cry of indignant horror
and forbid the attempt in the most unequivocal way. He struggled to rush
forth and inform the police and the community; but he heard himself
chuckle and felt himself slap the two burglars on the back, and knew
that he was saying to them: "Heave ahead, my bloaters! I owe the old
Dutch clock one for the naggings she's treated me to. I'm on this job,
that's what I am!" And then he puffed away at his short clay, and kept
on chuckling until he felt quite sick with misery.
"He's the right sort, so he is," said Bill, "and no two ways abaat it."
"Right yer are," said Jemmy. "'E's the sort o' pal for me, and no
error."
Once more the judge's ghost wandered about from one malefactor to
another, and from one victim to another, always assisting the
malefactors and jeering the victims, and always welcome as a friend by
the former, and cursed as an enemy by the latter. He had no rest night
or day; he was constantly racked and harrowed by some new shock of grief
or repugnance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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