"Well, old Bansted Downs," said the son, "I have been thinking that I should like to be apprenticed to a Genius, with a view to adopting his calling." "Very well thought out," said the parent. "I must consider whether the necessary premium----" "Pray do not trouble about that," said the son, "as my success at the word competitions has more than provided for the contingency." And young Bansted Downs drew from his pocket a large bag filled with a mixture of sovereigns, marbles, and peppermint-drops. "Very good! Then the matter's settled; and perhaps you would like something to eat." All the friends by whose opinion old Bansted Downs set any store heartily approved of young Bansted Downs's choice of a calling; and the matter was fully discussed that evening. The advertisement columns of the newspapers were consulted as to the most suitable genius to undertake the charge of the youth; and the following seemed promising:-- "_To Parents and Guardians._--_Young men of promise wishing to adopt the profession of genius will do well to apply to Brayne Power and Sons, of 3019A, George Street, Hanover Square, who have a vacancy for one apprentice. Telephone No. 7142863._" The very next day young Bansted Downs called at the address given, and was shown into the presence of Power senior, a man of venerable appearance, whose high broad forehead, far-away gaze, long hair, and abstraction sufficiently revealed his calling. "It will be fifty pounds--twenty-five down, and the rest in monthly instalments of one pound after you have got your H.A.W.," said the Master Genius. "If you please, what is my H.A.W.?" asked young Bansted Downs. "Your final degree--your Head Above Water." "That will not be just yet?" asked the youth. "Oh, dear, no! Not for a very long while, if ever. There are two preliminary degrees to get before that. There are the F.I. and the E.P.--your Foot In and your Ear of the Public; and before you can obtain either of these you will have to Make your Mark." "I can sign my name--will not that do as well?" asked the youth. [Illustration: "THE MASTER GENIUS."] "That entirely depends upon the sort of name. If it's just a surname with a coronet over it, it entitles you to your F.I. and your E.P. without any examination. You have the same advantage if you can append to your signature either of the following affixes: P.P. (Pertinacious Pusher) or C.I. (Chum of the Influential). "But if you can't sign these kinds of names, you will have to Make your Mark. It's a difficult mark, and requires a lot of learning. "As the first instalment of twenty-five pounds down is all I am ever likely to get, I will take it now--no, that one won't do; it's a peppermint-drop, not a sovereign. _That's_ not the way to get on, young man!" "Isn't it?" asked young Bansted Downs thoughtfully. "I'm glad you told me. I thought perhaps it might be; but, of course, I've got to learn."