That was another thing--her neatness was something inhuman, something
almost appalling. She always put everything back in its place, always
folded up the papers and laid them down tidily on the table when she
had finished them, always devoted the hour after breakfast and after
tea to the writing of letters, was always dressed and ready exactly a
minute before the gong sounded. Neat, neat, heartlessly neat, were all
her proceedings, from the way she docketed her ideas to the way she
buttoned her boots and did her hair. True it was, indeed, that the maid
was responsible for these details, but she, too, had evidently been
mastered by Gundred’s devastating tidiness. Never a thought mislaid,
never a curl misplaced, never too much or too little of anything, no
excess, no enthusiasm, no hot outbursts, nothing but a serenely equable
development, as cruel and crushing in its steady, remorseless movements
as the advance of a steam-roller. If she sat, she sat with perfect
correctness: feet in the proper position, hands folded in her lap,
or prettily occupied with some pretty piece of work. If she walked,
it was crisply, concisely, without softness or undulations, erect,
well-modulated, and poised in the certainty of faultlessness. And the
very qualities that had so appealed to Kingston’s fastidiousness a
month before, now became a terror when he contemplated a lifetime’s
endurance of them. To see Gundred ruffled, muddy, untidy, would have
been as great a joy to him as water in the wilderness; but no wind ever
tumbled the orderly daintiness of her hair, no gale ever pushed her hat
out of place, no mud ever dared adhere to her brilliant little boots.
Never tired, never angry, never out of looks, Gundred was also never
buoyant, never ecstatic, never radiant, and the bland sweet monotony of
her threatened to become as maddening to her husband as the incessant
repetition of one level, unvarying note.
One or two small habits she had, too, which exasperated him at times.
She was fond, for one thing among others, of talking about God in a
frequent, casual way that he found intolerable in its assumption of
intimacy, and in its cheapening of the soul’s most private thoughts.
God’s, to Gundred, was the biggest name on her visiting-list, and she
displayed it with a pride that people quite devoid of terrestrial
vulgarity sometimes think it allowable to display when talking of their
acquaintance in celestial circles. Her soul had a tinge of supramundane
snobbishness, and though, on earth, she would not have thanked a
Queen for a kiss, she took a gentle satisfaction in emphasizing her
possession of the Almighty’s approving friendship. She conceived heaven
as an enormously magnified and everlasting Court-concert, where only
the “nicest” people were admitted, and where she herself was not only
to have the entrée, but to be in the very heart of the royal set.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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