As soon as we were quite by ourselves, "Lord!" said she, "I was
monstrously flurried coming hither, for I met Montague in the Park, and
could hardly get clear of him--I was fearful he would follow me here."
As she first mentioned him, I thought it gave me a kind of right to ask
her some questions concerning that gentleman, and the occasion of her
rupture with him. She answered me very candidly--"To tell you the truth,
my dear Lady Stanley, it is but lately I had much idea that it was
necessary to love one's husband, in order to be happy in marriage." "You
astonish me," I cried. "Nay, but hear me. Reflect how we young women,
who are born in the air of the court, are bred. Our heads filled with
nothing but pleasure--let the means of procuring it be, almost, what you
will. We marry--but without any notion of its being an union for
life--only a few years; and then we make a second choice. But I have
lately thought otherwise; and in consequence of these my more serious
reflections, am convinced Colonel Montague and I might make a
fashionable couple, but never a happy one. I used to laugh at his
gaieties, and foolishly thought myself flattered by the attentions of a
man whom half my sex had found dangerous; but I never loved him; that I
am now more convinced of than ever: and as to reforming his morals--oh!
it would not be worth the pains, if the thing was possible.
"Let the women be ever so exemplary, their conduct will have no
influence over these professed rakes; these rakes upon principle, as
that iniquitous Lord Chesterfield has taught our youth to be. Only look
at yourself, I do not mean to flatter you; what effect has your
mildness, your thousand and ten thousand good qualities, for I will not
pretend to enumerate them, had over the mind of your husband? None. On
my conscience, I believe it has only made him worse; because he knew he
never should be censured by such a pattern of meekness. And what chance
should such an one as I have with one of these _modern_ husbands? I fear
me, I should become a _modern_ wife. I think I am not vainglorious, when
I say I have not a bad heart, and am ambitious of emulating a good
example. On these considerations alone, I resolved to give the Colonel
his dismission. He pretended to be much hurt by my determination; but I
really believe the loss of my fortune is his greatest disappointment, as
I find he has two, if not more, mistresses to console him."
"It would hardly be fair," said I, "after your candid declaration, to
call any part in question, or else I should be tempted to ask you, if
you had really no other motive for your rejection of the Colonel's
suit?"
"You scrutinize pretty closely," returned Miss Finch, blushing; "but I
will make no concealments; I have a man in my eye, with whom, I think,
the longer the union lasted, the happier I, at least, should be."
"Do I know the happy man?"
"Indeed you do; and one of some consequence too."
"It cannot be Lord Biddulph?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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