Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
It had been a trial to me that she should be so much better off than I.
Not only did it leave the less for me to do for her, but it created in
her a spirit of detachment against which I chafed in vain. Out of the
common fund of our marriage she made large reserves of herself, as she
might have made reserves—which she did not—of her income. Our beings
were allied, but they were not fused. For fusion she had too much that
she prized to give away. In such quantity as I could give she made
return to me; but having so much more than I to give, her reserves
became conspicuous. Of what she withheld this room was the symbol. It
was never my room. My comings and goings there had been made with a
kind of reverence, as if the place were a shrine.
The only abiding note of my personality had been my photograph at the
head of Vio’s bed. There was a photograph there now, but I saw that the
frame was different. Mine had been in a silver frame; this was in
red-brown leather. If it was still mine...
But it was not mine. It was that of a colonel in an American uniform,
wearing British and French decorations. Big, portly, handsome, bluff,
with an empty left sleeve, he revealed himself as a hero. He was a
hero, while I ... It occurred to me that death was not the only means of
giving Vio her freedom, and that I ought to tell her so.
To do that I was making my way down-stairs with the words framing
themselves on my lips.
"Vio," I meant to say, "if you don’t want me back, if anything has
happened to make it best for me to go away again forever, you’ve only to
say the word and I’ll do it."
But while I was still descending she swept into the hall. Her movements
were always rapid, with a careless, commanding ease. She was once more
the Zuloaga woman all on fire within.
"How long do you think it will be, Billy, before your tailor can make
you look as you ought to?"
I paused where I was, some three steps above her. "It may hardly be
worth while to consider that, Vio—"
"Oh, but it is," she interrupted. "If we’re going to put this thing
through we must do it with some dash. That’s essential."
"Why—why the dash?"
"Because there’s no other way of doing it. Don’t you see? If you just
come in by the back door—" She left this sentiment to continue in her
own way. "Alice Mountney is going to give a big dinner and invite all
your old friends."
My heart sank.
"Is that necessary?"
"Of course it’s necessary. It isn’t a matter of preference. As far as
that goes it will be as hard for me as for you. If I took my own way I
should never—" Once more she left me to divine her thought while she
added, firmly: "It has simply got to be done. We must make people
think—"
"What?" I challenged, when she paused, not apparently from lack of words
but from fear of using them. A suspicion impelled me to say in
addition, "How much did Wolf repeat to you of the story I told him?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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