Janey walked fast, and every now and then she ran for little sprints.
Her breath sobbed in her throat, her eyes were fixed and her hands
clenched. She climbed recklessly over gates, and plunged through copses;
her hair was soon almost on her shoulders, flying from her face in
wisps, straggling round her ears; her face became flushed and moist with
the heat--she tore her sleeve, and scraps of bramble hung on her skirt.
What woman but Janey would have rushed to confront a faithless lover in
such a state? But even now, when almost any one would have realised how
much depended on her appearance, she was careless and oblivious. She did
not feel in the least dismayed at the start given by the servant who
admitted her, nor, later, by her own reflection in a mirror in the
study.
It was the same little book-lined room in which she had had tea with
Quentin on her first visit to Redpale. There was the glorious Eastern
rug which he had said "had her tintings--her browns and whites and
reds." There was the big pewter jar that had then held chrysanthemums,
but held roses now. They were delicate white roses, faintly, sweetly
scented. Janey went over to them and laid her hot face against them. She
could hardly tell why, but they seemed to bring into the room an alien
atmosphere. Quentin had never given her white roses--as a matter of fact
he had given her scarcely any garden flowers, except chrysanthemums--he
had once said that only wild flowers were for wild things. She thought
of bunches of buttercups, of broom with bursting pods, of hazel sprays
and tawny grasses. Now she suddenly wished that he would give her a
white rose. She took one out of the jar, and was trying to fasten it in
her breast when footsteps sounded outside the room.
She turned deadly pale, and dropped the rose. For the first time she
felt that she had been foolish to come. Quentin might be angry with her,
for her coming would rouse his father's suspicions. Her hurry and
desperation might prejudice him against her. In an unaccustomed qualm
she realised that she was flushed, dishevelled and perspiring. She felt
at a disadvantage, and drew back as the door opened, seeking the shadows
by the hearth.
"Janey!"
He stood in the doorway, his hand on the latch, his chin thrust forward,
his pale face bright in the gleaming afternoon. His youth struck her
with a sudden appeal--his youth and delicacy, both emphasised in the
soft yellow light--and a sob tore up through her breast.
"Oh ..." she said, and moved towards him.
He shut the door.
"Oh, I'm sorry I came!" she cried.
He did not speak, but came forward, stopping abruptly a few feet away.
"Janey--I want to explain...."
"Explain...." She had not thought there would be any explanation
needed--or, if needed, possible.
"Yes--I ought to have written, but I couldn't, somehow--or rather, I
wrote you a dozen letters, and tore them all up."
She wondered why she felt so calm.
"I--I asked my father to call and see you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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