The Tithe-Proctor: The Works of William Carleton, Volume TwoCarleton, William
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The Tithe-Proctor: The Works of William Carleton, Volume Two
Carleton, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Molly immediately made her appearance.
“Troth I dunna who he is,” she replied; “he's some poor boy on his
keepin', about tithes, tha' _He_ brought here to-night.”
“That's a cursed lie, Molly; wid' many respects to you, _He_ couldn't a'
been here to-night.”
“Thank you, sir, whoever you are; but I tell you it's no lie; and he
was here, and left that boy wid me, desirin' me to let him come to no
injury, for that--” and this was an addition of her own, “there was
hundreds offered for the takin' of him.”
“Why, what did he do, did you hear?”
“He whispered to me,” she replied, in a low voice, but loud enough for
M'Carthy to hear, “that he shot a tithe-proctor.”
“We'll see what he's made of, though,” said one of them; “and, at all
events, we'd act very shabbily if we didn't give him a share af what's
goin'; but aisy, boys,” he added, “take care--ay! aisy, I say, safe's
the word; who knows but he's a spy in disguise, and, in that case, we'll
have a different card to play. Hallo! neighbor,” he exclaimed, giving
M'Carthy a shove, who started up and looked about him with admirable
tact.
“What--what--eh--what's this? who are you all? what are you about?”
he asked, and as he spoke, he sprung to his feet. “What's this?” he
exclaimed again. “Sweet Jasus! is this Fagan the tithe-proctor that I
shot? eh--or are you--stay--no--ah, no--not the polis. Oh, Lord, but
I'm relieved; I thought you were polis, but I see by your faces that I'm
safe, at last--I hope so.”
“Ay, to be sure, you're safe--safe--as--as the bank (hiccup). You're a
gintlemen, si--r you're a Con Roe--the ace o' hearts you are. Ay, you
shot--like a ma--an, and didn't card--ard him wid tomcats, and then put
the poo--oo--oor (hiccup) devil into a grave lined wid thorns; ah, you
cowardly ould villain! the devil, in the shape of a to--to--tom-cat
will card you in hell yet; an' moreover, you'll ne--never--ever die in
your bed, you hard-hearted ould scut o' blazes; an' that you may not, I
pray Ja--sa--sus this night--an' God forgive us all--amin, acheema!”
“Hould your drunken tongue, Ned,” said he who seemed to assume authority
over them; “we want to put this poor boy, who died of liquor to-night,
into the bed, and I suppose you'll have no objection.”
“None at all at all,” replied M'Carthy, assuming the brogue, at which,
fortunately for himself, he was an adept; “it's a good man's case, boys;
blood an' turf, give him a warm birth of it--he'll find it snug and
comfortable.”
They then placed the corpse on the bed but changing their mind, they
raised him for a moment, putting him under the bedclothes, pinned a
stocking, about his head to give him a domestic look; after which they
returned to the tap-room of the shebeen-house, for such in fact it
was. The latter change in the position of the corpse was made from an
apprehension lest the police might come in search of the body, and with
the hope that he might pass for a person asleep.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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