Helena lay on the edge of the bed, listening to the ecstatics of one
friend and to the impertinences of the other. In spite of her ironical
feeling, the thunder impressed her with a sense of fatality. The night
opened, revealing a ghostly landscape, instantly to shut again with
blackness. Then the thunder crashed. Helena felt as if some secret were
being disclosed too swiftly and violently for her to understand. The
thunder exclaimed horribly on the matter. She was sure something had
happened.
Gradually the storm, drew away. The rain came down with a rush,
persisted with a bruising sound upon the earth and the leaves.
“What a deluge!” exclaimed Louisa.
No one answered her. Olive was falling asleep, and Helena was in no
mood to reply. Louisa, disconsolate, lay looking at the black window,
nursing a grievance, until she, too, drifted into sleep. Helena was
awake; the storm had left her with a settled sense of calamity. She
felt bruised. The sound of the heavy rain bruising the ground outside
represented her feeling; she could not get rid of the bruised sense of
disaster.
She lay wondering what it was, why Siegmund had not written, what could
have happened to him. She imagined all of them terrible, and endued
with grandeur, for she had kinship with Hedda Gabler.
“But no,” she said to herself, “it is impossible anything should have
happened to him—I should have known. I should have known the moment his
spirit left his body; he would have come to me. But I slept without
dreams last night, and today I am sure there has been no crisis. It is
impossible it should have happened to him: I should have known.”
She was very certain that in event of Siegmund’s death, she would have
received intelligence. She began to consider all the causes which might
arise to prevent his writing immediately to her.
“Nevertheless,” she said at last, “if I don’t hear tomorrow I will go
and see.”
She had written to him on Monday. If she should receive no answer by
Wednesday morning she would return to London. As she was deciding this
she went to sleep.
The next day passed without news. Helena was in a state of distress.
Her wistfulness touched the other two women very keenly. Louisa waited
upon her, was very tender and solicitous. Olive, who was becoming
painful by reason of her unsatisfied curiosity, had to be told in part
of the state of affairs.
Helena looked up a train. She was quite sure by this time that
something fatal awaited her.
The next morning she bade her friends a temporary good-bye, saying she
would return in the evening. Immediately the train had gone, Louisa
rushed into the little waiting-room of the station and wept. Olive shed
tears for sympathy and self-pity. She pitied herself that she should be
let in for so dismal a holiday. Louisa suddenly stopped crying and sat
up:
“Oh, I know I’m a pig, dear, am I not?” she exclaimed. “Spoiling your
holiday. But I couldn’t help it, dear, indeed I could not.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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