These were hours when the girl was quite naive and natural, when she
spent herself in ripe enjoyment--almost child-like, healthy. At other
times there was an indefinable something which Gaston had not noticed in
England. But then he had only seen her once. She, too, saw something in
him unnoticed before. It was on his tongue a hundred times to tell her
that that something was Delia Gasgoyne. He did not. Perhaps because it
seemed so grotesque, perhaps because it was easier to drift. Besides, as
he said to himself, he would soon go to join the yacht at Gibraltar,
and all this would be over-over. All this? All what? A gipsy, a
dompteuse--what was she to him? She interested him, he liked her, and
she liked him, but there had been nothing more between them. Near as he
was to her now, he very often saw her in his mind’s eye as she passed
over Ridley Common, looking towards him, her eyes shaded by her hand.
She, too, had continually said to herself that this man could be nothing
to her--nothing, never! Yet, why not? Count Ploare had offered her his
hand. But she knew what had been in Count Ploare’s mind. Gaston Belward
was different--he had befriended her father. She had not singular
scruples regarding men, for she despised most of them. She was not a
Mademoiselle Cerise, nor a Madame Juliette, though they were higher on
the plane of art than she; or so the world put it. She had not known a
man who had not, one time or another, shown himself common or insulting.
But since the first moment she had seen Gaston, he had treated her as a
lady.
A lady? She had seen enough to smile at that. She knew that she hadn’t
it in her veins, that she was very much an actress, except in this man’s
company, when she was mostly natural--as natural as one can be who has
a painful secret. They had talked together--for how many hours? She
knew exactly. And he had never descended to that which--she felt
instinctively--he would not have shown to the ladies of his English
world. She knew what ladies were. In her first few weeks in Paris,
her fame mounting, she had lunched with some distinguished people, who
entertained her as they would have done one of her lions, if that
were possible. She understood. She had a proud, passionate nature; she
rebelled at this. Invitations were declined at first on pink note-paper
with gaudy flowers in a corner, afterwards on cream-laid vellum, when
she saw what the great folk did.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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